The Tools in Your Toolbox

Dannah Gresh: Has a child (maybe your child?) ever asked you a stumper? Elizabeth Urbanowicz says it’s okay not to always have an answer.

Elizabeth Urbanowicz: You can say, "Oh, I am so grateful that you came to me with that question. That's a really good question. Do you know I've never actually thought of that before? And here's the truth. I don't know the answer to that question. But you know what? There's an answer out there. Let's find it together."

Dannah: This is the Revive Our Hearts podcast with Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth, author of Adorned, for April 24, 2026. I’m Dannah Gresh.

If you’re walking through the 2026 Bible reading plan with us, you know we’re reading from the book of 2 Kings. In today’s passage, we read about King Hezekiah, who was a bright spot in the list of Judah’s kings. He received a scary, threatening letter from the Assyrian King Senacherib, and . . . well, I’m not going to spoil it for you if you haven’t read it yet. To sign up and read through the Bible with women from around the world, go to ReviveOurHearts.com/Bible2026. You can opt in to daily emails to encourage you along the way. Again, it’s ReviveOurHearts.com/Bible2026. 

This week we’re talking about renewing our minds. On Monday Blair Linne shared how the Lord calmed her struggles with anxiety and panic attacks after she hit a deer with her car. 

Blair Linne: I have had to ask God for help to breathe. I’m grateful for that, because what it does is it helps me to see my humanity. It helps me again to see that I don’t have the resources. I’m not in control. In seeing that, I then go to the One who is in control.

Dannah: Tuesday, Nancy told us about the Greek word sophron, and how God’s Word calls us to be sober-minded and self-controlled.

Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth: It’s a crucial concept for every believer at every season of life, and it’s repeated more often than any other quality or characteristic in the book of Titus. Six times in the book of Titus we have reference to this concept of self-control.

Dannah: A renewed mind will never happen apart from the Scriptures. So for the last couple of days we’ve been talking about how to help children grow in their love for God’s Word. We’ll hear more from that panel discussion in a moment. Incidentally, if you missed any of those programs, they’re all available on the Revive Our Hearts app, or at ReviveOurHearts.com.

Here’s Nancy, talking about the intentionality, the proactiveness needed when it comes to passing on God’s wisdom to future generations.

Nancy: Listen to these words in Proverbs chapter 2—in fact you may want to turn there—Proverbs chapter 2 beginning in verse 1. Hear the way this father, Solomon, says to his son that he needs to pursue wisdom. He needs to be intentional about it. Proverbs 2:1–4,

My son, if you receive my words and treasure up my commandments with you, making your ear attentive to wisdom and inclining your heart to understanding; yes, if you call out for insight and raise your voice for understanding, if you seek it like silver and search for it as for hidden treasures.

Let’s just stop there before we move on. Do you hear the earnestness here? If you desire this, if you receive this, if you treasure this up, make your ear attentive. Tune your ear like you’re listening for the faintest sound. Incline your heart. Set your heart. Don’t stop there. Call out for it; raise your voice for it; seek it like silver; search for it as for hidden treasures.

We’ve all had the experience of losing something, in our home or . . . I can lose something in my purse and not find it for months. Now I carry a smaller purse so that won’t happen. But you know what’s like to just tear up your house looking for a check or a bill or something valuable that you’ve lost.

I know what it is to spend long periods of time trying to track down some obscure fact or quote on the internet. I’ll search and search. I’m on a mission. I’ve got to find this. I need this quote; I need this stat. I need this check. I need to find this.

We go on a mission. We get intentional about it and we say, “Get out of my way. I’m going to find what I’m looking for.”

That’s the picture here. I’m on a mission. I’m on a pursuit. There’s nothing casual about this pursuit. I’m looking for wisdom. Let me say that you don’t have to be old to look for wisdom. Far better that you start when you’re young!

You know what? The women in this room who are older would say, without exception, “I wish I had been more earnest in searching for wisdom when I was younger.”

I see a lot of heads nodding. I wish that I had been more diligent. I wish that I had cried out for wisdom. I wish that I hadn’t waited until I was married before I started searching for wisdom. Before I raised my children and didn’t do it God’s way, I wish that I had searched for wisdom.

To do that requires intentionality. It requires earnestness. It requires pursuit. 

Dannah: That’s Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth, reminding us there’s significant effort involved in searching for wisdom and in passing it along to children and grandchildren.

Thankfully, parents and grandparents have some wonderful tools they can use along the way—tools to help kids develop an appetite for the things of God. 

That’s where our panel is headed today in part three of their discussion. You’re about to hear the voices of Bob Lepine, Sarah Jerez, Kevin DeYoung, and Elizabeth Urbanowicz, in that order. They’re authors and speakers, and collectively they’ve invested thousands of hours in the lives of children. Recorded at a recent True Woman conference, here’s Revive Our Hearts' Board Chairman Bob Lepine.

Bob Lepine: You have thoughts about music and how we incorporate it? I mean, I’m looking at Sarah, who is a musician. I’m just thinking how big music was in our home, how much Scripture our kids know because there was a melody attached to it. Thoughts on that?

Sarah Jerez: Yes, I love music, and I echo the words of Martin Luther. He said, “Next to the Word of God, music is worth the highest praise,” and I really believe that to be true. I think God created music for His glory, for our joy. It’s really one of the greatest instruments to absorb information. I think we sing about what we love, and we end up loving what we sing about. It’s just such a powerful tool that was meant to stir our feelings for God.

But obviously the enemy, as with everything, has corrupted music as well. The truth is, music can make anything sound or feel true. So I’d say, first of all, in the negative sense, you really need to think about the songs that your kids are listening to. In our house, we do listen to secular music. We don’t have specific rules about that,” because we really love music in general, but we do have filters. We use that as an instrument to think, “Okay, what is this song saying? Is this true? Why or why not? What does God say about that?”

Sometimes you might be doing work at home, trying to be in the Word, but they’re in their room twenty hours a week listening to songs that completely contradict what you’re teaching them—and that is really going straight to the heart, because music is powerful.

We have worship on, but also those memory songs. There are some albums—I think Nancy has mentioned them on her podcast— Hidden in My Heart: Scripture Lullabies. We’ve been listening to those since before Zoe was born.

I remember the other night—we were talking about one of those organic moments—I was going to teach on Philippians. I mentioned Philippians 4, and my daughter just cited it in front of me. I was like, “Oh, when did you . . .? I didn’t teach you that. Did you learn that at church?” And she said, “No, it’s in these Scripture lullabies we hear at night. I know all the verses.”

“Oh, great!” But it’s just an easy way to get the Word in your kids’ hearts. One of our theme verses in our house is Colossians 3:16, which says, “Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another through songs, hymns, and spiritual songs.”

Songs actually teach. It’s just a fact. Even practically, you can have songs that you use when memorizing verses, which I also suggest off of what Elizabeth was sharing: give context to the verses you’re memorizing. Don’t just memorize random verses. 

I’ve talked to older women who say, “Oh wow, I didn’t know what that verse was about. I just memorized it when I was a kid.” It would be great if, when you memorize a verse, you give context: Who wrote this? Who did he write it to? Why? What were they talking about?

There are so many resources nowadays of Scripture songs, even for really little kids. Our kids still sing a song that we sang when they were tiny:

Where is God? Everywhere.
Where is God? Everywhere.
God is everywhere. 

And they still sing it to this day. So the melodies are just so important when you’re trying to memorize God’s Word. Something practical you can do is pick a song that’s really important to you, or that they sing at church, and make that your song for the month. Sing it before bed every night, and then discuss it line by line—maybe one verse each week—and talk about what it means. Sometimes kids know all the songs from church, but they don’t really understand what they’re talking about. That was part of the heart behind the book we wrote too: helping kids understand the truth in the songs they sing. Walking through each verse slowly, one verse at a time. As they are singing it, to really grasp what they’re singing about.

Bob: Kevin, Elizabeth mentioned the New City Catechism. I know you were involved in that project, and each of those questions and answers has a song attached to it. So it’s a great way for kids not just to memorize a catechism, but learn it through the songs. Should parents be catechized? Should we be looking for those questions and answers—like, Who made you? God made me. What else did God make? God made me and all things.

Kevin DeYoung: In the history of the church, catechesis has been the predominant way one generation passes the faith to the next. In the Western church, most catechisms consisted largely of three things: the Apostles’ Creed, the Lord’s Prayer, and the Ten Commandments. There’s lots of other things we can do, but if your Christian school, homeschool co-op, or church isn’t doing something with those, then you’re out of step with what the church has done for most of history.

Even if you haven’t used the New City Catechism or other catechisms, those three areas are the core:

• The Apostles’ Creed—what are the core doctrines of the faith?
   
• The Ten Commandments—what does it look like to obey God and live a life pleasing to Him as His people?
   
• The Lord’s Prayer—how do we talk to God and live in communion with Him?

There are lots of good resources. I grew up in the Dutch Reformed tradition, so I memorized large parts of the Heidelberg Catechism. I commend that to Presbyterians. Today, we also have the Westminster Shorter Catechism and children’s catechisms, which are great shorter versions. Find something that is theologically sound and fits your tradition. You should be Presbyterians, but if you aren't, I get it. (laughter) 

Now, will every kid memorize everything perfectly? No. Some will become “superstars,” and others won’t, but they’ll internalize more than you realize. Child psychology shows there are ages where it’s easier for children to memorize than adults. My kids now have had to memorize things like the Gettysburg Address, portions of the Declaration of Independence, and FDR’s speeches. They have to do this for their American history class. They're eight, and they are just getting it.  And, they can get Scripture through songs and catechism at a young age.

I’m so grateful I learned the Heidelberg Catechism as a kid. Those just come back to me. Questions like: What is your only comfort in life and in death? or What do we mean by God’s providence? It is His almighty and ever present power by which He upholds, as with His hand, heaven and earth and so rules over all creatures, etc.

If you get five of those in your head, it's amazing how often you come back to those five.

Bob: And Elizabeth, you've looked at the developmental stages of kids four to twelve in particular. So help these moms who have kids that age. What are they capable of? How do you focus in on those different developmental stages?

Elizabeth: Parents have probably seen our kids are capable of so much more than we give them credit for. But really, in that age range from around three to six or seven, you know, just depending on where they are developmentally, that's the age when they're just like sponges. They can memorize so much. So that is the age when you want to start those memorization tools. You know, whether it's Scripture through song or longer passages of Scripture or catechism, that is how God has designed our kids' brains at that time.

And then usually around the switch from seven to eight, that's when our kids developmentally are able to consider a perspective outside of their own. Now, it happens at different ages for different kids. Some start early around seven. Some it goes a little bit later, around the age of nine. But our kids are able to start thinking critically and considering how other people are thinking, somewhere between that seven to nine age range.

So we want to encourage our kids to ask questions, whether it's about Scripture or about other things in life, because they're naturally curious during those early developmental stages when they're young, but also in that seven to nine, even up to ten range. And so it's really important, because there's so much information thrown our kids' way, and especially once they get to be about eleven or twelve, and they care more about what their peers think. There's so much information thrown their way, we want to make sure that we have developed really good, open lines of communication with them.

And so if, as you've been going through this session, and you've been thinking, Oh my goodness, I have a lot to learn about Scripture if I'm going to lead my kids in Scripture, that's a good thought, because we can't teach our children. We can't pass on to our children something that we don't have ourselves, and so we ourselves need to be immersed in God's Word.

 

But what I see is a lot of times is parents get scared when kids start asking questions, for one of two reasons. Either they think, Oh, my goodness, my child is questioning the faith. This is the beginning of the end. Or they think, I have no idea how to answer that question.

Well, when our kids ask questions, it is not a bad thing, because God is the God of the universe, and Christianity is actually true, and so we don't need to be scared of questions.

So when our kids ask us questions, even if your child comes to you and asks you a question about Scripture or about something in society that just shocks or horrifies you, it's a good time to keep your poker face on, keep a smile, and say, "I am so grateful that God has given you a mind that thinks so carefully. Thank you so much for coming to me with that question."

Because when we affirm our kids' questions, we let them know that we are a safe and loving place to bring those questions to. And who do we want them to bring their questions to? Do we want them to bring them to Google, to TikTok, to friends, to a teacher that probably doesn't know Jesus? No, we want them to bring their questions to us.

If your child asks you something, and you're like, "I don't know. This is a Bible question, and I should know the answer, and I don't, and I just feel completely stupid right now." Don't freak out, because you know what? It is a huge gift when you do not know every single answer.

If every time your child comes to you and asks you a question, you have the perfect answer, or you fudge a perfect answer, what you're training your child to do is you're training them to blindly trust you. And if you train them to blindly trust you, that blind trust is one day going to be transferred to someone else. And we don't want our children to blindly trust any fallible human.

So if your child comes to you with a question that you just don't know the answer to, it's not a bad thing. You can say, "Oh, I am so grateful that you came to me with that question. That's a really good question. Do you know I've never actually thought of that before? And here's the truth, I don't know the answer to that question. But you know what? There's an answer out there. Let's find it together."

And you might not have time. Your child might ask you this right before bed, and it's a stall tactic. And you're like, "We do not have the next forty-five minutes to debrief this. You just have to go to sleep." But you can say, "That's a great question. And you know what, tomorrow after dinner, or tomorrow when you get home from school, or this weekend, whenever it is, we're going to carve some time out, and we're going to find an answer to that question." Giving your kids skills to find solid answers is so much more valuable in the long run than just hoping that they're going to blindly trust you.

Bob: If folks want more information about the stuff that you've developed, because it's for homes, not just for schools, go to your website. Is there stuff in the resource center?

Elizabeth: Yes. So if you go to FoundationWorldview.com, you can find all of the information there. We also do have a booth in the resource center.

Bob: Kevin, if God loves everyone, does he love Satan? I just thought I'd throw one of those kid questions at him and see what he does with it.

Kevin: No, would be my short answer. I'm trying to think of how would I say it to my kids? I would say, first of all, there's no verse in the Bible that talks about God loving Satan. God loves in us what he sees of Himself and His own character. And what do we mean by love? We mean He wants what is best. He holds out hope. The devil has already so hardened himself there is no hope. His state cannot be changed.

So would God forgive anyone who came and repented? Yes. But the devil is one creature who cannot and will not. If you want more layers, you can always say, in one sense, God loves all the things that He has made, and the devil is His own creature. But I think that mainly leads our kids in a wrong direction. I think that sort of question is one that adults don't dare to ask because we think, Well, we should already know that one. Kids ask questions that are really hard sometimes because they're so simple—they're not simple.

People have asked me this before. “Jesus—He's God, right?” 

“Yep.” 

Whenever that comes, you're like, “Oh, this is going to get really confusing.”

“So when He came down, He was born as a baby.” 

“Yep.” 

“So did He leave heaven in order to be born?” 

The answer is, actually no, He didn't. You might think it is. You can Google Kevin DeYoung, "Did the Son of God leave heaven?" You can get the answer. I usually just point my kids to a website and just tell them to read my blog, but it's just an example.

But here's the point, especially younger kids, they don't need . . . My kids will be like, "Dad, you're giving your preacher voice." They probably will be content with a rather simple answer.

So, does God love the devil? Well, you know, in a way, God loves every creature He's made in that He always wants what is best for those creatures. But you know, the Bible talks about how the devil is God's enemy, and God will punish the devil, because the devil has nothing but sin, and God has to be angry with sin.”

Bob: Would you mind just giving us your number so that we can call you when we get those questions.

Elizabeth: . . . at seven o'clock at night, when they're asking the questions before bed!

Bob: Ladies, thank you for the time. Thank these panelists for their answers.

And I want to close just by praying for you and for your kids. Father, our kids are so much a burden in our heart. Your Word is true when it says we have no greater joy than to know that our children are walking in the truth, and there is no deeper pain than when our kids aren't walking in the truth.

And so Lord, we pray first that You would do Your work in our kids' hearts, the work that we cannot do—that You would awaken them to Your glory; that they would delight in You; that they would repent of their sins and turn to You at an early age, and that they would love Your Word, because You have put that love for Your Word in their heart, and they would follow You and pursue You all of their days.

Lord, give us wisdom as parents to lead and guide and point our kids in the right direction. Protect them, we pray, from our own mistakes that we will make, and we pray that they would be mighty in their love for you throughout their days, and that you would guard their hearts and minds in You.

And again, I pray for all of these moms that what they've heard here today, that has been beneficial, that they'd be able to take that home and implement it and begin some new pathways in their home. We ask all of this in Your name. Amen.

Dannah: Amen! Bob Lepine has been praying for the moms and grandmoms that were in attendance at a workshop at a recent True Woman conference, but his prayer extends to you and me, too. Even if you’re not a parent, you still influence children and young adults in important ways.

Kevin DeYoung, Elizabeth Urbanowicz, and Sarah Jerez all have some wonderful resources that can be a big help in your interactions with children. They mentioned The New City Catechism, as well. You’ll find it all at a link within the transcript of this program, at ReviveOurHearts.com.

While you’re there, don’t forget about our online assessment tool to help you reflect on whether or not you’re self-controlled and sober-minded. This would be a wonderful thing to walk through with a child, too. It’s not complicated. It’s just two columns with a variety of characteristics and questions to ponder. Again, you’ll find a link to that evaluation in the transcript of this program. 

And last but not least, to anyone suffering from anxiety, especially after a traumatic event, we’re commending the book Made to Tremble, by Blair Linne. She shares helpful insights on how the Lord delivered her out of all her fears. It’s our thank-you to you for your donation to Revive Our Hearts. 

We’re listener-supported, so that means we depend on the prayers and financial gifts of friends like you. You can play a part in helping us call women to freedom and fullness and fruitfulness in Christ. You can make a donation at ReviveOurHearts.com, or when you call 1-800-569-5959. And be sure to request Blair Linne’s book Made to Tremble when you do. If you can make a donation at ReviveOurHearts.com, thank you so much!

Well, you wouldn’t normally head to the cemetery to have a church service with the “residents” there. Whatever you said would fall on deaf ears and lifeless hearts. But on Monday, Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth will tell us about a time when God told the prophet Ezekiel to do exactly that. Well, it wasn’t a cemetery; but it was a whole valley of dry bones. 

Find out what it means, and what it has to do with you and me, on Monday. 

Have a wonderful weekend. Keep renewing your mind. Read your Bible. Go to church and worship with your family in Christ. You need them, and they need you. And then be back for Revive Our Hearts.

This program is a listener-supported production of Revive Our Hearts in Niles, Michigan, calling women to freedom, fullness, and fruitfulness in Christ.

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