A Good Defender

Laura Booz: Oh, it was about ten years ago that I was at a field day with my kids. It was piping hot. Some of my older kids were in races, and I was standing by this little kiddie pool with my one-year-old son. It was filled with some water for an activity they were going to do later in the afternoon. He was just kind of balancing there, with both of his hands on the rim of the pool, and a group of big boys came over. 

I say big boys, but they were probably seven or eight years old. They started to egg each other on. They looked at him and they said, “Hey, put your head in the water.” “Yeah, put your head in the water.” And my little one-year-old is looking at them, trying to figure out what he should do. 

Now as a momma, I’m sitting there thinking, How quickly can I get my son to safety? and How effectively can I communicate to these boys that that’s not how you treat a baby?

Well, I didn’t have to think about it for too long, because another big boy came up, and he stood in-between my baby and that group of boys, squared his shoulders, he looked them in the eye and said, “Put your own head in the water.”

Boom! Talk about powerful! This was amazing! The boys backed away. This was all it took. I am there thinking, Who taught that little boy to do that? Who taught him to see when someone was helpless and needed a voice? Who taught him to speak up, what to say, and how to say it? 

It was truly amazing. Because the truth of the matter is, speaking up and judging righteously and defending the rights of the poor and needy don’t come naturally to most people. Chances are, someone taught that little boy how to see and what to do. 

Chances are, I will need to teach my own children how to see the oppressed and what to do to come to their rescue. I think that begins when I ask God for the grace of a heart for the needy. I must open my hand to the poor. I must reach out. I must speak up. Only then can I coach my kids effectively. 

Our lessons begin right here at home, day by day. Sometimes through intentional devotions and conversations and experiences, but more often through unplanned convenient teaching opportunities. One after another after another after another, teaching my children to respect the older and to protect the younger, and to honor everyone.

To realize that no means no, and yes means yes. 

To learn that we do not coerce or manipulate or lie. Instead, we practice sincerity and hospitality and honesty. 

When we get distracted with our interests and we push forward no matter what, we repent as quickly as we can. 

We return to the reality that God created all people in His image, and He calls His children to love one another. 

Now, as my children get older, we have to be learning how to identify oppression and its complexities and veils. We need to learn how to listen well, and of course, we need to speak up and to do something. To know the difference between what is helpful and what is not helpful. And all along from beginning to end, we must press in and pray to the God who hears the cry of the oppressed, to look for Him to act mightily on their behalf. 

This is going to require a lot of time and energy. It’s going to be hard work, and I am going to be finding myself crying out to the Lord, time and time again. But it will be some of the most important eternal, meaningful work I can do, this side of heaven. 

You know, Proverbs 14:31 says, “Whoever oppresses a poor man insults his Maker,but he who is generous to the needy honors him.” Honors God. 

Every tragic mass shooting, every statistic about poor work ethic and apathetic public engagement, and immortality, and lack of family commitment, every statistic about drugs, crime, incarceration, abuse of power, points to the strong possibility that as a society, we are failing our young men and women. 

This is a complex issue. As women of God, as mothers in the Church, we can do something. We can ask God for the compassion, and wisdom, and strength to do the next right thing in our own sphere of influence. 

Maybe you’ll see it in Proverbs 31. Proverbs 31 is often a chapter directed solely towards women. But as it turns out, it’s really a conduit that a woman listens in and then passes it along to the son it is intended for. Because what we see in Proverbs 31 is one woman, coaching her one son, showing him how to run from the temptation to become an oppressor, and run toward a lifestyle that reflects the very heart of God. 

Let me read those verses for you. It’s from Proverbs 31:1–9: 

The words of King Lemuel [that’s King Solomon]. An oracle that his mother taught him:

What are you doing, my son? What are you doing, son of my womb?
What are you doing, son of my vows?
Do not give your strength to women,
your ways to those who destroy kings.
It is not for kings, O Lemuel,
it is not for kings to drink wine,
or for rulers to take strong drink,
lest they drink and forget what has been decreed
and pervert the rights of all the afflicted.
Give strong drink to the one who is perishing,
and wine to those in bitter distress;
let them drink and forget their poverty
and remember their misery no more.
Open your mouth for the mute,
for the rights of all who are destitute.
Open your mouth, judge righteously,
defend the rights of the poor and needy.

This is amazing, amazing teaching from one mother to one son. And it’s amazing that we get to lean in and listen and learn. The very act of defending the helpless will defend this young man, from the age-old current that would sweep him away into a self-indulgent lifestyle at the expense of many others. 

It reminds me of Psalm 119:134, “Redeem me from man's oppression, that I may obey your precepts.” That means redeem me from being oppressed and redeem me from being an oppressor. 

King Solomon’s mother is saying, “Son, do not waste your life, instead invest your strength and use your influence for the good of others. Do not oppress other people, especially the people within your care. Consider the ways your hobbies and your free time, and your work, and relationships affect people. And invest your life in others.”

This is a mom who sits her son down and asks him “Do you know who needs to be heard? Can you identify someone who needs to be protected, or defended, or set free?”

This is a mom who sits down with her son and squares her shoulders and looks him in the eye and she says, “Son, you have a voice. Use it to speak up for someone who doesn’t. Son, you have influence, use it to defend people’s rights. Son, you have strength, use it for good.”

Oh, how I want my sons and daughters to be good defenders. I want them to teach their children to be good defenders. I want to be amongst the mothers who coached their sons and daughters to be good defenders and who teach them to teach their sons and daughters to be good defenders. 

But most of all, I want them to know and depend upon and find joy in God’s heart for the helpless. I want to know personally that God has come to their defense. He sees them in their spiritual poverty. He has spoken up for them through Christ. He has rescued them from sin through the death and resurrection of His Son.

I want them to be able to proclaim with all of their heart Psalm 9:9: 

The LORD is a stronghold for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble.And those who know your name put their trust in you, for you, O LORD, have not forsaken those who seek you. Sing praises to the LORD, who sits enthroned in Zion! Tell among the peoples his deeds! For he who avenges blood is mindful of them; he does not forget the cry of the afflicted.” (vv. 9–12)

Well now, I’ll fast forward about four years from that hot summer field day, and that little baby boy is approaching kindergarten age, and I am in the whirlwind of raising babies and children and homeschooling and ministry. And honestly, we were in-between two homes at the time, and I was overwhelmed. 

I felt like instead of teaching my son much about becoming a defender and speaking up for the helpless, I was instead just feeding him fruit snacks and letting him watch shows all day. I felt like I was failing him. 

I remember one day I was laying on my face before the Lord in tears saying, “Lord, I desired so much more for my son. I was hoping by now that I would have taught him so much more, and equipped him with so much more, and strengthened him with so much more. Please have mercy. Please help.”

Well, the Lord works in mysterious ways, because at that moment, I remembered an ad that I had recently seen for a soccer camp. I looked up the details and discovered that the class would be right down the road from our house, and the deadline for registration was that day. I reached out the coach and he said he had one spot left, so I signed my boy up. 

On the first day of soccer practice I packed up all of the kids. The girls brought their schoolwork to do on the sidelines, and we camped out while my son, Malachi, met the coach and met the other soccer players on the field. 

My heart swelled, because he looked like he had been made for this. He was really doing something. 

After a few drills, the coach set up this little scrimmage—I think it was like 3 on 3. The kids started running this way and that way, just trying to get that soccer ball in the goal. 

At one point, the kids on Malachi’s team all ran toward the goal, but Malachi looked over his shoulder, broke away from the pack and ran back to his goal. He stood in front, ready for the ball to return down the field. His coach watched all of this happen, and he called out, “You’re a good defender, Malachi.”

Oh, my heart. Tears just streamed down my face in appreciation, because the coach called out what I wanted for my son. I want him to be a good defender, not just on the soccer field, but in life. I want him to have a warm heart for people who need protection and help. Even if everyone else is running full force toward their self-ambition and indulgence, I want my son to look around and offer his strength and energy in helping others—just as Jesus did for each one of us. 

I went home and took a large sheet of white paper and a big fat Sharpie. I wrote the words “You’re a good defender, Malachi.” I put quotations around it and at the bottom I put the attribution “Coach Eric.” 

Then I took another like piece of white paper to hang right next to it, and I wrote, 

Open your mouth for the mute,
for the rights of all who are destitute.
Open your mouth, judge righteously,
defend the rights of the poor and needy. (Prov. 31:8–9)

Do you know what I have found? When we accept God’s unique calling on our lives to be the women God created us to be, it affects the men around us and can strengthen the next generation. 

As you and I trust in the Lord as our strong Defender, He will help us to imitate His compassion and to encourage men of all ages to be the good defenders God wants them to be. 

Revive Our Hearts wants to help you live out your God-ordained femininity, and you’ll find all kinds of resources to do that when you visit ReviveOurHearts.com. 

I also write about the role God’s called me to in this season of life, the role of being a mom. You can find out more by getting a copy of the book I wrote, with the same name of this podcast, Expect Something Beautiful. For more information visit LauraBooz.com. 

Expect Something Beautiful is a production of Revive Our Hearts, calling women to freedom, fullness, and fruitfulness in Christ.