Expressing Your Uniqueness

I'm so glad God created two genders. Now, admittedly, at times I've tried to foist my “femaleness” on my dear husband by expecting him to exhibit characteristics more like a “girl friend” than the rugged man he is. But when I honestly evaluate the differences and qualities unique to each gender, I have to say, “God, You did this right!”

Today, let's consider how we express our femininity in more substantive ways than time spent in malls, dressing up for dates, collecting hundreds of lipstick colors, or the love of “Southern Living” décor. 

Femininity is expressed by:

1. Helping:

It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make a helper fit for him (Genesis 2:18).

Whoa, it's that word: “helper”! Why do we resent that term? Why is the “helper” role so commonly equated with inferiority or insignificance? John MacArthur doesn't see it that way:

Woman was made by God to meet man’s deficiency. —John MacArthur

A married woman uses her distinct strengths and insights as a woman to aid her husband as his partner and beautifully “complements” him. The same Hebrew word translated “helper” is also used when referring to the Holy Spirit and He is definitely not inferior nor insignificant!

2. Intelligently submitting:

“Christ also . . . kept entrusting Himself to Him who judges righteously . . . In this same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands . . .” (1 Peter 2:21-3:1).

The battle of the sexes began in the garden. Because of the fall, men and women are tempted to react in extremes that distort the beauty and design of God’s created order: passivity or aggression. Women are tempted to  either live as doormats or to boldly usurp the man’s headship.

The biblical ideal is men demonstrating humble, loving, headship; and women responding in joyful, intelligent submission.

3. Encouraging masculinity:

I love John Piper's definition of “mature femininity” in his excellent little book, What's the Difference:

At the heart of mature femininity is a freeing disposition to affirm, receive and nurture strength and leadership from worthy men in ways appropriate to a woman's differing relationships.

When I focus on this definition, it gives me a better understanding of my “helper role.” I am to “help” my man be the best he can be! I'm inspired to encourage men to live out their masculinity to God's glory! Wow. Now my unique role makes more sense.

How will you express your femininity today?

John MacArthur, The MacArthur Study Bible (Nashville: Thomas Nelson, 2006), 19. (Note: Taken from Gen. 2:18 study notes)

About the Author

Kimberly Wagner

Kimberly Wagner

Kimberly Wagner is the author of Fierce Women: The Power of a Soft Warrior and is a frequent guest on Revive Our Hearts radio program, as well as a regular contributor to the blog. Kimberly's passion is Christ and she … read more …

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