How to Help the Weak

This episode contains portions from the following programs:

"Women Helping Women"

"Do Not Waste Your Pain"

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Dannah Gresh: I’ll never forget a time when I was feeling down, depressed, weak, unable to cope with the pressures of the day. My friend Janet called. Now, I was still in bed . . . and I shouldn't have been. Janet did what any good friend would do—she came over. But she did more than that.

Since I wouldn't come out of bed, she crawled right in bed next to me. She said, "Dannah, I don't think you need to be in this bed right now. But I'm going to stay in bed right here with you until you are ready to get out.

Before long I remember us crying and laughing together and we were downstairs together drinking tea.

I was not feeling strong that day. I was weak. Janet didn’t lecture me. She didn’t chew me out and start telling me all the reasons I shouldn’t feel sorry for myself. She helped me.

You’re listening to Revive Our Hearts Weekend. I’m your host, Dannah Gresh. 

This month we’re working our way, phrase by phrase, through 1 Thessalonians chapter 5, verse 14, which says, “And we urge you, brothers, admonish the idle, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with them all.”

We’ll look at patience next time, but today is all about helping the weak.

Janet helped me when I was weak. You and I can help others, too. Can I draw your attention to one segment of society that can really use help? It’s the families of special needs children. Maybe you know someone in that category. Maybe you’re there yourself. 

Let me tell you about the Thifault family. In the fall of 2010 Carrie Thifault felt the Lord leading her to memorize Psalm 34. She was pregnant with their seventh child, Micah. She thought it would be a perfect chapter to meditate on during the holidays in Micah's birth.

Carrie Thifault: "I sought the Lord and he answered me and delivered me from all my fears. Those who look to him are radiant and their faces shall never be ashamed."

Dannah: Micah Thifault was born on Wednesday, December 29, 2010. Carrie and her husband Chris brought him home thinking that everything would be normal. But on New Year's Eve they had to rush Micah back to the hospital.

Chris Thifault: She came out of the house with Micah in her arms and was quite concerned and said he was shallow breathing and pale and that we needed to get him somewhere quick!

Carrie: I could tell he was in trouble. At this point, he was in respiratory distress.

Dannah: What followed was a blur of hospitals, doctors, even an emergency helicopter ride. They had to get Micah to a newborn intensive care unit—also known as a NICU.

In that middle of all that activity, Chris and Carrie had a moment in a small hospital room alone with Micah. 

Chris: I just remember being tired, feeling totally helpless and dependent on the Lord as we stayed in this little room and waited to hear news.

Dannah: Carrie recited a verse she and Chris had chosen to be Micah’s life verse. Psalm 34, verse 3.

Carrie: “Oh magnify the LORDwith me, and let us exalt his name together.”

Chris: When you’ve got what we called stormy-weather faith vs. fair-weather faith, these trials are where the testing of your faith produces endurance. This is where growth happens. You find out what you really believe by that moment. He strengthens you.

Dannah: Micah didn’t come home from the hospital for another nine months. There were open heart surgeries, kidney failure, life support. He was one sick little baby boy! Carrie stayed with him pretty much around the clock. 

Carrie found herself in a place of weakness, if nothing else, because of having to be at the hospital all the time. For Chris and the six children at home, this turned into an opportunity to live out our phrase for today: Help the weak.

Chesed Thifault: It was not an easy time for a five-year-old.

Dannah: Here’s Chris and Carrie’s daughter, Chesed. 

Chesed: I remember Daddy would rush home and back to the hospital multiple times, and he was running errands for Momma. He would bring home a chicken. We would have sweet potatoes, broccoli, and a chicken every night.

Carrie: On a really hard day, one of the hardest days, Chris brought in a package that Revive Our Hearts had sent to us.

Dannah: That package from Revive Our Hearts included a Scripture memory lullaby CD.

Carrie: I immediately put the CD in, and we were playing it at the hospital. It had Scripture on it, and it created a really peaceful tone in the room.

Song from Hidden in Your Heart: 

. . . and give you peace . . . 

Dannah: Revive Our Hearts also sent Chris and Carrie a devotional called Streams in the Desert. When she received it, Carrie opened it to the reading for that day, January 11. It quoted Isaiah 40:1, “Comfort, comfort my people.” Here’s Carrie reading from that devotional.

Carrie:

You will be wounded so that in the binding up of your wounds by the Great Physician, you may learn how to render first aid to the wounded everywhere. Do you wonder why you are having to experience some great sorrow? Over the next ten years . . .

And I just read that ten years ago. That just struck me as I was reading this again, because I read it ten years ago.

Over the next ten years, you will find many others afflicted in the same way. You will tell them how you suffered and were comforted.

Dannah: Chris and Carrie did exactly what that devotional talked about. They didn’t complain about their situation or focus only on their own suffering. They saw this stay with Micah in the hospital as a mission to serve others. Chesed saw how her parents were using this trial as an opportunity.

Chesed: They would share the gospel or reach out to Micah’s nurses, whether it was to buy chocolates . . .

Chris: I say if you are going to bring candy, bring good candy. So we would bring those little Godiva chocolates and send some tracts with them.

Chesed: . . . and banana bread, or really any goodies that my dad finds at Costco.

Chris: What was so important was that they were seeing people that were at peace and comforted and not anxious—as I think of in Philippians 4.

Dannah: Even after Micah came home, the Thifaults had lots more chances to help the weak. Here’s Chris again.

Chris: Caring for a 100% incapacitated child 24/7. Each of my kids jumped into it and loved him and learned so much each day how to care for someone that is hurting.

Dannah: Libby Thifault showed our team a picture from one of Micah’s first days home.

Libby Thifault: Here’s all the siblings holding him one of the first times. There’s me, there’s Luke, Jacob, and Chesed, and there is Haddie.

Dannah: Their son Joshua had moved away to college, but still was very much part of Micah’s life.

Chesed: I think they learned a lot about putting someone else’s needs above their own.

Chris: We would read a book or just snuggle with him or lay with him in bed or help with his nightly routine.

Dannah: Here are Libby and Haddie, as they look at more pictures from Micah’s early days.

Libby: This one shows me and him reading together. You can see in the picture that he is super focused on it.

On Saturdays we would love to snuggle on the couch and sit . . .

Haddie Thifault: . . . and watch cartoons.

Dannah: As the years went by, Micah learned to push himself in a walker. And the kids used this as an opportunity to include him in games.

Libby: We loved playing outside with him when it was a pretty day. 

Haddie: We sometimes played baseball or soccer. 

Libby: We always wanted to make him fit in, that he was playing also.

Dannah: Jacob Thifault remembers watching Nascar races together with his brother. Micah couldn’t sit up very well, but he would lean on a wedge-shaped Styrofoam pillow. Jacob would surround Micah with toy cars and a race track. Then they’d watch the race together.

Jacob Thifault: It was a bonding time—even in his limited state. Through the trucks and everything, it was something where you could say we could relate. You could tell that he was enjoying it and laughing.

Chris: I think that’s what Micah taught the most in those nine-and-a-half years. It was just realizing the importance of caring for someone who is hurting.

Chesed: Multiple times all throughout Micah’s life, my parents would make it very clear that, “No, we don’t have favorites. Just because Micah’s going to the hospital or because he is in need of more care . . . it’s not that we don’t care about you or we don’t worry or think about or care for you any less. We don’t have any favorites.”

Some people say the squeakiest wheel gets the most help or something. But I don’t think I ever felt any jealousy for it.

Dannah: Isn’t that a sweet picture of helping the weak? Micah’s short life mattered. And the whole family banded together to help him. 

There’s more to the Thifault’s story. You can hear it or watch the video when you go to ReviveOurHearts.com/weekend, and click on today’s program.

You know, the Bible talks a lot about helping others. It uses terms like “compassion” and being “tenderhearted.” Both Matthew and Mark talk about how Jesus saw the crowds of people, “and he had compassion on them, because they were like sheep without a shepherd.” 

Jesus’ compassion moved Him to action. He did something about it. The English word “compassion” is made of two parts: “com” meaning "with or alongside," and “passion,” which comes from the Latin word for "suffering." So, someone who has compassion enters into the other person’s suffering. That’s the English.

In Greek, the language of the New Testament, it’s an even more colorful word that has to do with a visceral, gut response. See, feelings of love and compassion were thought to come from a person’s bowels. Someone moved with compassion very literally feels it in their gut.

Okay, enough of the language lesson. How do we live out a life of compassion? How do we “help the weak?” That’s something both Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth and Nicole Furno have addressed. Let’s listen. First up: Nicole Furno, speaking at a Revive Our Hearts event not too long ago. 

Nicole Furno: How do we live with this compassionate lifestyle? What if we looked upon a croud and we’re not filled with compassion for them? Because, after all, acts of compassion are rarely convenient. And . . . we’re all likely busy women. We have jobs, careers, families, schedules we’re trying to maintain.

One of my girlfriends recently said, “We’re kind of like the airlines. We’re overbooked. We’re oversold. We’re overcapacity. And we need somebody to get off the plane or take a later flight.”

But what we can see from the life of Jesus is that His opportunities to show compassion, a lot of times, were when He was on His way to doing something else.

I think in our lives, some days we have our schedules, our agendas, and we’re going to be on our way to doing something else, and Jesus is going to give us an opportunity to stop and be filled with compassion and to do something. So, Sisters, may we welcome what we would consider these interruptions and use them to bless others and to meet the needs of those around us.

But again, how is it possible? If acts of compassion are rarely convenient, and we’re already overbooked, we’re oversold, how is it possible to live a compassionate lifestyle?

Well, here’s some good news, ladies: the source of our compassion is not natural but supernatural. The source of our compassion is the Holy Spirit. And so the good news is that same Spirit that resided inside Jesus Christ now lives inside each of us, and we are sealed with the Holy Spirit until the day of Christ Jesus.

We can ask for a fresh filling of that Spirit when our hearts are hardened toward the crowds around us or toward the needs of those around us.

And in addition to asking the Holy Spirit to fill us with His compassion, something else we can do is we can remember and we can respond to the compassion that God has shown us because we know that it was because of God’s compassion that He sent Jesus to earth. It was because of Jesus’ compassion that He left the comforts of heaven to come to earth to die on our behalf.

It’s not about mustering up our own compassion or trying to kindle it on our own. But as we fully surrender and we recall the compassion that God and Jesus has shown us, that will fill us, it will simply spill out onto those around us.

So praise the Lord our source of compassion is not natural but supernatural. It’s supplied by the Holy Spirit. It’s in response to the compassion that God and Jesus have already shown us.

And so as I close for today, I wanted to tell you a story about a mom and her son that my husband and I met at an orthopedic hospital in Ethiopia about five years ago. And when we were there, the doctor told us this story.

A young boy had been born with a bunch of congenital deformities, and he couldn’t walk. So each morning, this mom would put her son on her back, and she would walk one hour to school in the morning and do the same thing, carrying him one hour on her back on the way home.

While we were there, this boy, I would say he’s about ten years old, had just received a life-changing surgery and was learning to walk for the very first time.

As I saw this petite mom with her tall, lanky son, you just couldn’t believe that this is what she had done for her son. I began to think, What love and what endurance! What perseverance this mom had. This mom’s compassion had led her to action on behalf of her son.

But, you know what ladies? The truth is, before we came to know Christ, we were all just like that little boy. We were limping through life. We were unable to help ourselves. We were weighed down by our own sin.

But because of our Father’s compassion, He sent Jesus to redeem me and to redeem you. Jesus, our compassionate rescuer, came to earth and carried His own cross to His own death so He could carry us from death to life.

Because of the compassion Jesus modeled and that we have been shown, may it be said of each and every one of us that not once did we feel compassion and do nothing. But let us carry each other’s burdens and so fulfill the law of Christ.

Because as Christian women, we don’t follow the ways of the world that says to take care of ourselves first. We know that our greatest need is for Jesus. And as we meet the needs of those around us, He will meet our needs.

Dannah: That’s Nicole Furno, with some practical ideas for how we can live lives of compassion as we work to help the weak. 

Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth was addressing a group of women’s ministry leaders when she shared this next piece. But you don’t have to serve in an official church capacity to apply these truths to your own life. Here’s Nancy.

Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth: You have practical abilities and gifts you can use to help others, help for young moms or new moms who . . . Some of these moms never were mothered. Some of them have never held a baby until they held their own in their arms. Some of them have got a lot of little ones, and they just need a little bit of a break. They may think they’re losing their minds, but maybe they just need a word of encouragement.

I’ll tell you, again, I go back to the gym. A little bit of encouragement can go a long way in the gym and in life. Friendships, relationships, the “one another’s” of Scripture, accountability, checking in with each other, asking questions and so much of this is simple, daily, ongoing ways that we can help others.

Now, I know it’s easy to feel that there’s so much need. It’s overwhelming. But just remember, we’re not called to help everyone. We’re called to just be sensitive to the Spirit and to be responsive when He prompts us. Just to stop thinking about ourselves and our feelings and our moods and how our day is going and just be sensitive to the people God has put around us that we can encourage.

Now, change and growth take time. There are no quick fixes. A lot of people are carrying a lot of baggage with them from a lot of years. So we may have to be in it with people’s lives for the long haul. But how long has God been in it with us? He is in it for the long haul with us. People are broken and poor and needy. It’s easy to think that you have to have an advanced degree or extraordinary counseling skills or broad life experience to be able to help others. But remember that the Lord gives wisdom. Ultimately only He can help and rescue people. He is their Savior. We are not the Savior. Does that take some pressure off? I know it does for me.

I was reading in the book of Ezekiel in the past week or so. We talk about the sin of Sodom? But here Scripture says is what was their sin. “They had pride, excess of food and prosperous ease but did not aid the poor and needy” (16:49). They didn’t help. They were too selfish and self-satisfied to help others.

Unless you have an extraordinary gift of mercy (which I’ve never been accused of having, but I want to be more like Jesus and Jesus was very merciful), most of us would rather deal with healthy people than sick people, right? But the problem is we’re all sick. So get used to it. Helping others is messy. It’s not easy. It takes time and effort and sacrifice and being poured out.

Someone has said it this way:

Ministry is giving when you feel like keeping;

Praying for others when you need to be prayed for;

Feeding others when your own soul is hungry;

Living truth before people even when you can’t see results.

Ministry is hurting with other people even when your own hurt can’t be spoken.

Ministry is keeping your word even when it’s not convenient.

And ministry is being faithful when your flesh wants to run away.

The apostle Paul said, “In all these things I have shown you that by working hard in this way we must help the weak and remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how he himself said, ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive’” (Acts 20:34–36).

Dannah: Amen! Nancy will be right back to pray. 

You know, one way to help someone who is weak might be to give them a copy of Nancy’s book Heaven Rules. It’s a comforting, courage-inducing look at the sovereignty of God as seen in the book of Daniel. In fact, that title, Heaven Rules, is straight from Daniel chapter 4. We often feel weak and unable to control the circumstances around us. But what an encouragement it is to remember that God is in control. Heaven rules! 

This month we’ll send you a free copy of Heaven Rules as our way of saying “thank you” for your gift of any amount in support of Revive Our Hearts. Plus, we’ll include the new Heaven Rules discussion guide that goes with the book. That way you and a friend or a group of friends can talk about what Nancy says in her book, and ways you can apply it to your life.

The book and discussion guide are our gift to you in gratitude for your donation of any size. 

You can support us at our website, ReviveOurHearts.com, or ask about Heaven Rules when you call 1-800-569-5959. 

Next time on Revive Our Hearts Weekend, we’ll talk about the last command from the Apostle Paul in 1 Thessalonians 5:14: “Be patient with them all.” I hope you can join us for that. Meanwhile, why not pray that God would show you how to help someone who’s weak over the next several days.

Now, here’s Nancy to close our program in prayer.

Nancy: And so O Lord, I pray that in the days ahead You would make us givers, servants. I know these women are. That’s why they’re here. But I just pray for grace, that You would fill them up with Your grace, that You would support them strongly, that You would help us as we help others. Thank you, Lord, that You are the great Savior and Helper and Redeemer. As we go from this place, we want to do it in the fullness of the power of Your Holy Spirit and for Your glory. I pray it in Jesus name, amen.

Revive Our Hearts Weekend is calling you to help the weak find freedom, fullness, and fruitfulness in Christ.