Fighting the Sticky Emotions

Dannah Gresh: Before we begin today, I want to remind you of something important. Today’s program is possible largely thanks to our Revive Partners. The Revive Partner Team provides dedicated prayer and financial support that allows Revive Our Hearts to keep producing biblical, trustworthy content.

They’re investing in helping women experience freedom, fullness, and fruitfulness in Christ. To learn more about the benefits of becoming a Revive Partner and how to join the team, visit ReviveOurHearts.com/partner.

Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth: Dannah Gresh knows that wrong, negative thoughts and feelings can hold us captive.

Dannah: There is a lie under the emotion in the root of your belief system, and the only thing you can fight that with is the Person of Jesus Christ—because He is the truth, and He will set you free!

Nancy: She’ll share the secret of a fruitful life today on the Revive Our Hearts podcast. I’m Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth. It’s January 11, 2024. 

If there’s any one thing I would love to drill into your heart and mind this year, it’s the importance of spending time with the Lord and soaking in God’s Word daily. In fact, if you forget anything else I’ve ever said but remembered only one thing, I hope that would be what you would remember.

There is just no way to overemphasize the value of abiding in Jesus, abiding in His Word, so that His Word abides in us. And, Dannah, that’s what you’re going to talk about today.

Dannah: I am, but before we get to that, I want our listeners to catch some of that passion that you have, Nancy—passion to see us rooted in the Word of God. We actually shared this clip on our most recent episode of Revive Our Hearts Weekend.

It comes from a series you taught on Psalm 1, and it’s like the Old Testament parallel to the passage I’ll be talking about from John chapter 15. Let me read the first three verses: 

Blessed is the man
   who walks not in the counsel of the wicked,
nor stands in the way of sinners,
   nor sits in the seat of scoffers
but his delight is in the law of the Lord,
   and on his law he meditates day and night.

He is like a tree
   planted by streams of water
that yields its fruit in its season,
   and its leaf does not wither.
In all that he does, he prospers.” (Psalm 1:1–3)

Here’s Nancy, explaining verse 3 of Psalm 1.

Nancy: I want to take time today to unpack that analogy of a tree in verse 3 and say, “What does this have to do with us?” The verse says this righteous person, this blessed and happy person, is like a tree, and then there are three descriptive phrases. 

It’s a tree that is planted by streams of water, a tree that yields its fruit in its season, and a tree whose leaf does not wither. Let’s look at those phrases and see how each describes the righteous person, the person who is on the pathway of godliness.

First of all, like “a tree planted by streams of water.” I should have done this long ago, but this morning before I came to this recording, I happened to look up that word “streams” in the original language, and it wasn’t what I thought.

The word used there is actually used to refer to a small channel of water. This isn’t like a wide rushing river, necessarily, although that concept is used elsewhere in Scripture. But in this case it’s a small channel of water, as in irrigation.

This suggests to me that the streams of water here may not be natural streams. And that says something, that the water of God’s Word—the water of God’s Spirit—is not something we naturally find ourselves having access to. It’s a supernatural provision of God that comes from His heart to us. 

He is the stream of water that waters our roots and makes us fruitful—a supernatural source or supply of water. So how is this godly person like a tree planted—firmly planted, as the New American Standard Bible says—by streams of water?

A tree planted by a stream or an irrigation ditch, whichever it may be, has a constant supply of water, a source of nourishment. And so it is with the person who meditates on God’s Word day and night. As you do that, as you take this daily Bible reading challenge, your soul will be irrigated, it will be watered. You’ll have a constant supply of spiritual nourishment.

Now that word “planted”—it’s like a tree planted—the word literally is “transplanted,” like a tree that’s been transplanted. It’s not a tree that is just growing wild. The trees that are in the arid desert land of the Middle East can easily perish in times of drought.

And here’s a tree, it suggests, that’s been taken out of that dry barren environment and carefully transplanted into a place where it can not only survive, but where it can be secure and it can thrive, where it can be cultivated and tended, so that it can be fruitful and won’t perish!

What a picture is that of the life of a child of God! We were by nature wild, dead in sin. But by grace—the grace of God—through faith we’ve been transplanted! We’ve been taken out of the domain of Satan and darkness and transplanted into the kingdom of God, the kingdom of light!

We’ve been planted in Christ by the grace of God, planted where we have available all the means of grace that we need to live flourishing lives. The means available to us are the Spirit of God, the Word of God. 

The supply of God’s Word that we delight in and meditate on, that’s what nourishes us, and we’ve been planted in that place. Trees get beauty and get strength from their roots, which are generally unseen, hidden beneath the surface. But those roots draw sustenance and life and strength and nourishment from the water. 

And I see that as a picture of what it means to abide in Christ, to live in Him, to put down your roots deep into the soil of His character and His heart and His ways and His Word. Throughout the psalms you often see the psalmist—many times David—struggling with adverse circumstances.

But it always comes back to the fact that he’s still solid, he’s still secure: “I will not fear what man can do to me” (Psalm 118:6). Why? Because he’s like a tree firmly planted by rivers of water. He says, “I will find my refuge, I will find my strength in God. That’s where I draw my life.”

When you’re firmly planted in Christ and in His Word, you don’t have to be afraid of rejecting the counsel of the ungodly. You’re not going to be shaken easily by what others think about you or your Christianity. You’ve meditated on the Word of God, you’ve delighted in it, and that has become your pole star for direction. You’re operating through that grid. You’re planted in the Word of God. You’re all in! You’re going to be stable and secure and solid in the Word of God. 

Now the opposite picture there of a tree planted by a stream of water, is a picture of a tumbleweed in the desert. It’s not planted, right? It doesn’t have any roots. It just blows whichever way the wind blows.

And that’s what we see in Ephesians 4:14, for example, where the apostle Paul talks about those who are children, they’re tossed to and fro by the waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine. They’re a tumbleweed! 

That’s what’s true of the people who walk in the counsel of the ungodly. They don’t have roots that keep them stable and secure in times of adversity. So this righteous person is like a tree planted by streams of water.

And then here’s a second descriptive phrase: “It yields its fruit in its season.” This is not just a picture of a pipe, an inanimate object that is channeling water from one place to another. This is an animate object, something that’s alive.

This tree is alive. This tree takes in water through the roots, absorbs it, and at the appropriate time produces new life: mature, ripe, flavorful fruit. It’s this process: receiving life, giving life, producing life.

Now, having said that, trees don’t generally bear fruit instantly. You don’t just plant an apple tree and the next day have apples on your tree! We live in fruit territory here. Farmers know that that tree has to put down roots. It has to be built up and nourished. It has to mature.

And so the results in our lives of delighting in God’s Word and meditating on it day and night, having our lives rooted in God, you don’t see those results overnight. It takes time, it takes patience to bear fruit.

And that’s why I’m challenging all of our listeners (this is not for some select few, this is not for some spiritual club here)—every listener, I want to challenge you to take this daily Bible reading challenge this year. 

To say every day, “I’m going to have intake from the Word of God into my system. I’m going to take in the water of God’s Word.” You won’t necessarily see the fruit of that every day, but what happens is, over a period of time, you’ll see that you’ll be more fruitful spiritually.

You will produce the good fruit of God’s character and the fruit of the Spirit. And the quality of the fruit that you produce is dependent on what kind of nourishment you take in. The kind of nourishment the tree takes in will determine the quality of the fruit.

And remember that that tree has to have roots before it can bear fruit. That’s why it has to be planted. You can’t just take a branch and stick it in a coffee cup on your table! That branch is not going to have fruit, because it has no roots.

That’s why you’ve got to put your roots down into the Word of God, and then you will yield fruit in season. That’s what Jesus talks about in John 15: 

Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing . . . By this my Father is glorified, that you bear much fruit and so prove to be my disciples. (vv. 5, 8 ESV)

Prove what’s at the core and the heart of who you are, prove that Christ is in you because Christ’s fruit is being produced through you. Jesus said to His disciples, “I chose you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit and that your fruit should abide” (John 15:16). Quality fruit—the fruit of the Spirit, the fruit of Christ-likeness, the fruit of reproducing life in others! 

Dannah: Ah, what good reminders you gave us, Nancy, on this whole idea of bearing fruit by abiding in Jesus and His Word.

Nancy: Well, again, that’s from a series on Psalm 1 called “How to Have a Happy New Year.” It’s just as relevant for this year as it was when we aired it several years ago. You can listen to the whole message by clicking on the link in the transcript of this program at ReviveOurHearts.com.

Dannah: Yes, and that’s also where you can sign up to take the 30-Day Bible Reading Challenge, ReviveOurHearts.com, and find the transcript of today’s episode.

Nancy: And that 30-Day Bible Reading Challenge would be a great way to start out this new year! And now I’m eager for you to hear from Dannah! Here’s the context of the message we’ll be listening to today and tomorrow. 

Dannah is a graduate of Cedarville University, and in 2021 she was named Alumna of the Year for her alma mater. She gave this message during a chapel service at Cedarville. So, let me encourage you to turn to John chapter 15, and let’s listen to part 1 of Dannah’s message.

Dannah: I want to talk about “The Secret of Fruitfulness.”I imagine that you’re here at Cedarville for lots of different reasons, but one of them, for most of you, is probably because you have a burning desire in your heart to do something for Jesus. Right?

You want to be fruitful. You want to live a life that matters, that counts for eternity. So today, I want to talk about the secret to being fruitful. Now, the Lord has used me in spite of me. I have lived a fruitful life, and by His grace, I will continue to do that until the day I see Jesus face to face.

But it is kind of hard for me to believe that, and it is kind of hard for me to believe that I would be standing in front of you today, for basically three reasons. One is: as a student, I was far from the smartest woman in the room.

I came as an Elementary Education major, and as a sophomore in college, I failed elementary math! My advisor set me down kindly and said, “You know, the thing is, if you want to teach elementary math, you need to be able to do elementary math!”

And so, off to the Communication Arts Department I went. There was no math involved. They loved me. They accepted me. But here’s the problem: I was not a good communicator. We’re talking about a horrific communicator!

My first speech at Cedarville University was supposed to be an informational speech coming in at seven minutes. It timed in at a whopping twenty-two solid minutes! (laughter) And my professor left the class and went into her next class, Advanced Public Speaking, and said, “I just heard the worst speech I’ve ever heard in my history of teaching . . . and I’m pretty confident it’s the worst I will ever hear!” 

Unfortunately for her, my boyfriend Bob Gresh was sitting in the front row of that class, so news got back to me. (laughter) It wasn’t great for my confidence. So it’s kind of amazing that I’m here today.

But the biggest thing that held me back from being fruitful in my life wasn’t my abilities. It never is. It’s never about you; it’s always about Jesus. The biggest thing that held me back was that I was believing a lie . . . except I didn’t know it.

What I was aware of is that I walked around living my life in a cloak of shame. And when I walked through the doors of this chapel, I felt deeply lonely. I felt deeply ashamed of who I was. And the lie that I was holding on to—that I would yet discover—was that, “God can never use me!”

I wonder what emotions you drag into this room every day? Maybe shame, maybe depression, maybe anxiety, maybe fear. What do you bring into this room when you come to worship the Lord, when you come to open the Word that’s supposed to bring us freedom? What do you drag in here with you day after day after day?

Whatever it is, I know this: I don’t need to know what it is to know the truth, and that is that Jesus wants you to experience freedom from that! I know that because the key passage of True Girl is John 8:31 and 32, and it sets the heartbeat of what we want to do through our ministry.

You probably know it. It says, “If you abide in [me], you are truly my disciples, and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” Free from depression, free from anxiety, free from addiction and sin, free from shame, free from the fear or the lie that God can never use you. He wants to set you free.

Now, He wants to set you free. We love that part of the verse, right? “Pour it on, Jesus, give me the freedom!” But we often truncate verse 32 from verse 31. See, there’s something we have to do to cooperate with God’s work in our lives. It’s called “abiding in Him.”

“If you abide in Me, you’re truly My disciples. If you abide in Me—if you abide in Me!—you’ll know the truth and the truth will set you free!” So many of us are sitting around in churches all across America, and we are so saved, but we are far from fully free.

We look so much like the rest of the world in our anxiety and our depression and our stress. Why would the world want what we have if we don’t live in this full freedom that Jesus has promised to us? We’ve got to abide!

What does it mean to abide? Well, some versions say, “remain in Me.” Jesus is saying, “Stay! Stay with Me. Stay close. Draw near, please don’t leave Me.” Imagine the God of the universe asking you—asking me—“Stay!” But we wander. Or is it just me? Have you wandered? Have you failed to stay?

You know, the first sign that we’re wandering is often our emotions—the shame, the depression, the anxiety, the fear. All the bad stuff kicks in, the grief that never relents, our emotions. So I want to say a couple of things about emotions.

First of all, emotions are a good thing, a very good thing. How do I know that? Genesis 1. God created our emotions, and He declared everything He created was good, so our emotions are good. Even the bad ones are good and have a useful purpose, if we are using them the way that God designed them. So emotions are good.

Emotions are messengers. That’s how God designed them to function. They are supposed to show up, you feel them, and they’re telling you something. If you listen to God’s voice, if you listen to God’s Spirit, they’ll tell you what they’re telling you, and you’ll respond, and then the messenger will go away. Because that’s what messengers do.

They bring the message, and then they leave you alone. If I’m stressed, for example, highly stressed out of my mind and it never goes away, it’s probably because I haven’t done anything to fix this stress. And so I might need to do less. I might need to say the brave word, “No,” and then the stress will go away. See, that’s what emotions are supposed to do.

But here’s the problem: some of us in here have an emotion that no matter what we do, no matter how we tend to it, no matter how much we fight the shame, the depression, the anxiety . . . I want to be very careful to say that there are in a lot of cases medical components. We are physical beings and sometimes we need to use the tools that God gives us to take care of our physical beings: physicians, Christian counselors. 

But listen to me, so many times we run to that and we don’t do the spiritual things that need to be done in our lives. We don’t abide in Christ so that we can know the truth and the truth will set us free. 

I was writing a book for tween girls on emotions and working on getting them to be set free, because boy, at twelve years old, whoo! You do not really want to spend a whole lot of time with a twelve-year-old girl. (laughter) “Emotionally wealthy” does not even come close to describing it! (laughter)

Do any of you girls want to confess right now that this was true of you, perhaps? We are emotionally wealthy. We don’t know what to do with our emotions when we’re just beginning to feel them and experience them.

So I was asking my husband, “How do I tell a twelve-year-old girl that if the emotion comes and gives them a message and they do stuff but it doesn’t go away, that that is a sign of a lie in their life, and that they’re not experiencing freedom. They don’t know the truth, and they need to know the truth so that they can be free. How do you say that to a twelve-year-old girl?!”

And he said, “Well, I think I would call that a ‘sticky emotion.’” I was like, “That’s not just good for twelve-year-old girls! That’s good for ‘I’m not going to tell you how old I am’ girls!” (laughter) I love that! Don’t you love that? A sticky emotion.

A sticky emotion is a chronic negative emotion that never leaves, never goes away, will not submit to the truth of God, and it’s sending you a message. But the message is this: that there is a lie under the emotion, in the root of your belief system, and the only thing you can fight that with is the Person of Jesus Christ. Because He is Truth, and He will set you free!

So, what are you going to do about that sticky emotion? Incidentally, I met Bob at Cedarville in an Advanced Writingclass. We were a peer-graded class, so we broke off into groups. None of the other groups had names, but Bob named us, “The Misplaced Modifiers.” (laughter)

And he’s been naming “sticky emotions” and my books and all kinds of things ever since! He’s the CEO of our ministry. And really, me standing up here today is both of us up here, because he is such a big part of the fruitfulness in my life.

So, my sticky emotions were shame, and my lie that I would yet discover was that God could never use me.

For you to understand how painful that was, how crippling that specific lie was, I need to back up a few years. I came to know the Lord as a very young girl. At the age of eight, my mom handed me a devotional and a Bible and a notebook, and she established an expectation in my life that I would abide in Christ, that I would abide in His Word.

She just handed them to me as if I was twenty-eight, like, “You can do this!” And I love that my mom did that for me. I love that she established that expectation. There’s no “junior salvation,” there’s no “junior Great Commission,” there’s no “junior Holy Spirit.” 

Listen, if you are called to children’s ministry, do not believe the lie that you’re going to “one day graduate to the big people.” That is the most important mission field! Most of us decide what we believe and have no significant changes to that before our thirteenth birthday.

We don’t have any significant changes to our belief system, categorically, after that birthday. If you are called to the mission field of children, you are called to one of the most important mission fields on . . . the . . . planet! Hold your head high!

Nancy: That’s the cohost of Revive Our Hearts, Dannah Gresh, speaking to college students at Cedarville University. We’ll hear more of her story and what it has to do with abiding in Jesus tomorrow.

Isn’t that so true about what she calls sticky emotions? Maybe you’ve allowed yourself to be controlled by lies. Remember what Jesus told His disciples: the Holy Spirit was going to come and lead them into all truth. 

So if you’re struggling with the debilitating sense of shame or anger or bitterness or fear or some other sticky emotion, why don’t you ask the Lord to help you recognize the enemy’s lies and replace them with the truth of God’s Word?

And don’t forget about the Bible study resources we have for you at ReviveOurHearts.com, including that 30-Day Bible Reading Challenge we mentioned earlier. Those are intended to help you get a fresh start on your year, with your nose pointed into your Bible and your heart lifted toward Jesus. Again, our website is ReviveOurHearts.com, or you can call us at 1-800-569-5959. 

Now, would you say that you really know what it means to abide in Christ and to have His words abiding in you? Well, Dannah will be with us again tomorrow to help us understand more. Please be back for Revive Our Hearts.

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All Scripture is taken from the ESV.

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