Finding Freedom from Fear

Judy Dunagan: I am so blessed to be with you today. I’m so grateful that you’re here. I’m from Colorado, so I’m on Colorado time. This morning I got up really early, but not as early as you all here. I’d love to open our time in prayer, if we can do that, while still some are coming in. If you didn’t get a handout, they’re in the back. I’d love for you to grab one, because that will be something we’re going to follow along. Let’s just pray together and open our time that way.

Father God, we are so grateful for Your lavish love for us. I just thank You for all the women in this room. I thank You that You know their stories. You know if they’re battling fear right now or worry, and anxiety, and I just pray that our time together will be one to encourage them and equip them. We thank you, Jesus, that You want us to run to You with the burdens that we have. Your Word tells us to cast all out anxiety onto You, and I just pray that we will learn to do that, and we will learn to trust You and love You. We are so grateful for this opportunity and just pray for a blessed time in Your holy and magnificent name, we pray, amen. Amen.

Well, I live in Colorado Springs, and it’s, I have to brag, I think one of the most beautiful cities in the world. My favorite place to go is called Garden of the Gods. I don’t know if any of you have been there before. I’ve changed the name to the Garden of the One True God.

One of my favorite places to go . . . Well, there’s hiking trails and soaring rocks, and you can climb up and capture a view of Pikes Peak, which is at 14,000 ft, so it’s a distant view, and take a picture. But just two weeks ago, and I’ve lived there many years, I stumbled on an area I hadn’t been before. It’s just a quiet area and a beautiful pond with benches by it. What happened was, I sat down with my Bible and my journal. This pond was beautiful, and there were these soaring trees, these huge tree trunks over the pond. The pond is like glass, and the trees are bending over the pond and reflected in the surface of the pond.

And then all in a sudden we had ducks coming, like they were queued to come and hang out with me. One was this gorgeous white duck. I had never seen a pristine white duck. The duck gets in the water and is gliding across the water. There’s a muskrat coming, just gliding across the water. Then there’s a family of mallard ducks that are swimming, and then they get out and decide to take a nap right at my feet on the edge of the pond.

I’m sitting there thinking, I think I’m in a living Monet painting. It was stunning! I had this precious time with the Lord and journaling. I so needed it. I’m in a very busy season right now, and I’m in the Word.

Well, all a sudden, this woman walks up. I had been there about an hour, and she walks up, and she’s got a big dog on a leash, and she says, “I think I should warn you that there is a big bear about 200 yards that way, but he’s coming this way.”

I don’t have to tell you immediately I picked up my Bible and journal, threw it in my bag, and I followed the lady with the big dog to get away from the bear. We went to our cars that were in the parking lot.

But that can often be what it’s like with anxiety and fear that seems to come out of nowhere, right? Where we’re gliding along in our lives, like so much peace and trusting the Lord, being a good Christian not worrying, trusting God with our worries, when all in a sudden, something comes out and hits us, it seems, out of nowhere. And that blows up. That Monet painting for me, that living painting was blown up because of the bear, but often our peaceful lives, our lives where we’re trusting our God, that can happen to us.

I just assume with all of you here who were drawn to this workshop, that perhaps you’re dealing with some anxiety in your own life. My hope and prayer is that I’m going to be able to equip you and encourage you in that journey.

I just wonder, if I asked you, What is your greatest fear right now? What are you most worried about? I have a feeling that something comes to your mind right away. For some of you, it might be three or four things. Could you jot on your paper what you are most worried about. Just write it down, and we’re going to be looking back at that at the end of our time.

One of my favorite books on anxiety is called Calm My Anxious Heart by Linda Dillow. It’s a classic. It’s been out many years. I think she’s sold half a million of them. It’s a phenomenal book. She starts the book by quoting a French philosopher who said, “My life has been full of terrible misfortunes, most of which have never happened.”

That’s kind of a definition of worry. Where you just worry and worry about something that never happens. Well, I used to think that was kind of a fun statement, but you know what, people are really going through a lot. So I think there are probably some in this room that could say, “My life has been full of terrible misfortunes, most of which have happened.”

For me, probably about twenty years ago, my life was just hit with one thing after another. I tend to be an anxious person, ever since I was a little girl. I joke that I think it goes so far back that I was anxious right after I was born, because I wondered if I did that right. So even as a little girl, I was really fearful. When I became a young mom, it got even worse, because I had to worry about them, for their health and their safety, and now I’m a grandma.

Thankfully, all these years, I’ve learned to surrender some of those fears to the Lord, but this particular season, we were hit with one thing after another. We had one daughter who was very, very ill. It was very serious. She was a middle-schooler. Then my husband and I hit a hard time in our marriage where we loved each other, but we were just going through some really hard things. My mother-in-law had stage four cancer, and it was just one thing after another.

I’ll never forget, one night getting ready for bed, right before we went to bed, I said to Rick, “You know, I’ve loved and served the Lord all these years, and I’ve trusted Him, but there’s so much going on. I just don’t feel like we deserve it.” And I said these words: “This wasn’t supposed to be my story.” I think I said it more to God than my husband.

At that time, the only way I could fall asleep was if I would wear earphones and listen to worship music, and make myself listen to the lyrics of the song to keep my thoughts captive to truth. You know, when you’re in a season of deep grief or sorrow or fear and anxiety, your mind can just escalate, can’t it, to the “what ifs” and “if onlys.” I found one way to be able to rest was to have those earphones on and to try to fall asleep listening to the truths of the worship songs.

Well this particular night, remember I had just said this wasn’t supposed to be my story, and I had a new CD, a new worship CD I’d never heard before. It was kind of contemporary worship. It was one of those “Wow” that they used to sell years ago, if you’re familiar with that. So I put this CD on, and I had just said this wasn’t supposed to be my story. All of a sudden, about the third song in, it was an old hymn, called “Blessed Assurance.”

Now I grew up, I’m a Baptist minister’s daughter, so I grew up in the 60s and 70s, going to church three or four times a week and sang all the old hymns, but here are the lyrics of that song that started to be played over me:

Blessed assurance, Jesus is mine!
Oh, what a foretaste of glory divine!
Heir of salvation, purchase of God
Born of His Spirit, washed in His blood

This is my story, this is my song
Praising my Savior all the day long . . .

Just think about that, women. I’d just said really to God, “This wasn’t supposed to be my story,” and it’s as if He arranged to have that worship song, that old hymn, telling me what my story is. It’s not about the brokenness, it’s about Him redeeming our brokenness. It was as if He was singing over me.

After the impact of that song, I had to research the hymnist, the psalmist, the one who wrote the song. Her name is Fanny Crosby, and she’s a new hero of mine. She passed away in 1915, and this is a little bit about her life story:

She was blinded as an infant at about six weeks old by a botched medical procedure. Her father died when she was six months old. No, she was ten weeks old when she was blinded; her father died when she was six months old. She then married when she got older, and she had one baby, a little girl that they named Frances, and her baby didn’t live past infancy, most likely SIDS. She had a very, very difficult marriage.

And yet, as a young girl, her grandmother had told her, “You’ve got to memorize Scripture,” So from the age of ten, she started to memorize God’s Word. She grew up to write over 8,000 hymns, the lyrics. She was a poet. Can you imagine? Some of you know those hymns—“To God Be the Glory.” She wrote “Pass Me Not,” “All the Way My Savior Leads Me,” and then of course, “Blessed Assurance.” She also had a heart for the homeless, and she served at a rescue mission.

I want to share two of her most famous quotes with you that just took my breath away when I was in the midst of this sorrow time. She said, “If I had a choice, I would still choose to remain blind, for when I die, the first face I will ever see will be the face of my blessed Savior.”

And then this quote: “It seemed intended by the blessed providence of God . . .” (This is a Heaven rules quote. You heard Nancy last night talking about that.) Fanny wrote, 

“It seemed intended by the blessed providence of God that I would be blind all my life, and I thank Him for this. If perfect earthly sight were offered me tomorrow, I would not accept it. I might not have sung hymns to the praise of God if I had been distracted by the beautiful and interesting things about me.” 

Can you imagine?

Even in the midst of those things that all of us fear—a disability, a child who loses her life, a difficult marriage, she learned to press into her God.

So today I want us to look at some really hopefully practical ways to find freedom from fear, to combat fear. We’re going to look at, first of all, about pressing into God. I mentioned the Bible verse 1 Pet. 5:7, “Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.”

How do we cast our anxiety onto Him, and what does that mean? It’s easier said than done. Cast means to throw, or literally just hurl it onto God. I don’t know if you’ve been able to do that, but I’ve had to do that throughout my life when fear is trying to grip my heart.

You know, ladies, you can run to your God and be honest with Him and pour out your heart to Him and wrestle with Him and ask Him the hard questions about the fears that you are facing.

So how do we press into God? One of the first ways is dwelling in the promises of Scripture. Psalm 91 is a beautiful example of how you can dwell in Scripture. This is one way that I’ve been able to keep my thoughts captive to truth and to God and press into Him when anxiety is taking over.

My husband Rick and I, during that season, we started to read Psalm 91 so much together out loud like a prayer to the Lord, that we ended up memorizing it.

I thought today, I’m going to try this, just for you. I know at a conference like this you run from one thing to another, and you’re getting great content and taking notes and spending time with people and looking at the books, but I wanted to provide just a moment of quiet where I’m going to recite Psalm 91 over you. You can look it up, but I would also encourage you, maybe just bow your head or close your eyes and just listen to these words from the psalmist. Think of the thing that you wrote down that is troubling you or worrying you the most as I speak this over us, okay?

Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High
   will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.
I will say of the Lord, “He is my refuge and my fortress,
   my God, in whom I trust.”

Surely he will save you
   from the fowler’s snare
   and from the deadly pestilence.
He will cover you with his feathers,
   and under his wings you will find refuge;
   his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.

You will not fear the terror of night,
   nor the arrow that flies by day,
nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness,
   nor the plague that destroys at midday.

A thousand may fall at your side,
   ten thousand at your right hand,
   but it will not come near you.
You will only observe with your eyes
   and see the punishment of the wicked.

If you say, “The Lord is my refuge,”
   and you make the Most High your dwelling,
no harm will overtake you,
   no disaster will come near your tent.

For he will command his angels concerning you
   to guard you in all your ways;
they will lift you up in their hands,
   so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.

You will tread on the lion and the cobra;
   you will trample the great lion and the serpent.
“Because he loves me,” says the Lord, “I will rescue him;
   I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name.

He will call on me, and I will answer him;
   I will be with him in trouble,
   I will deliver him and honor him.
With long life I will satisfy him
   and show him my salvation.”

Amen, and hallelujah, correct? Beautiful, beautiful psalm, so do turn to it now. I want to unpack this psalm, because I’m giving you an example of God’s Word, especially the Psalms, you can just dwell in and see the truths, and how it will reach your frightened terrified heart.

Many of the Psalms were written by David. Often he was running for his life from either Saul or his son Absalom. Sometimes we’re told in a preface of a psalm that he was in a cave or he was just captured, and then he still wrote these amazing psalms, these lyrics to songs, really. He was like a poet, and often he turned to worship, or pouring his heart out.

Now, we don’t think he wrote Psalm 91. We’re not sure. Some think it was Moses, actually. Psalm 90, we’re told Moses wrote it, and I guess the rhythm of it, and the writing of it, so it could have even been Moses, or it could have been David.

I know if any of you are associated with the military, I have many friends living in Colorado Springs who are either in the military or married to someone in the military, or a parent of someone, and Psalm 91 is often their go-to psalm to pray protection, as if they’re being covered by the protection of God.

I kind of took apart this psalm, and I’m just going to read or speak this over you. You can do this on your own, too, but even just in the first four verses of this psalm, there are four different names of God. And then there are promises of what He does for us.

The names of God in this psalm is Most High. You’ll see that at the beginning. The Hebrew word for Most High is elyon. I love that. It means transcendent name, the highest of the high. He’s the Most High God.

Then Almighty. In Hebrew, that’s El Shaddai. I learned after moving to Colorado that El Shaddai, one of the meanings in Hebrew is God of the mountains. When you live around the mountains, you know that those mountains cry out His majesty. Shaddai also means measureless.

Then when you see the word, the name LORD in all caps in the Old Testament, that means Jehovah or Yahweh. Yahweh is the name for God that the Jewish people back in that time, they couldn’t even speak the word. It was so holy to them.

Then you see the word God, and that’s elohim.

And then at the very end, there’s the word “my salvation.” I have done some research in Hebrew the word for salvation is Yeshua, which is really Jesus. So when you get to the end of the psalm, it’s almost as if it’s talking about our Lord Jesus.

My father passed away five years ago. He was a godly man, a prayer warrior and a pastor. He’s the one who taught us about Psalm 91. I inherited his Bible. I’ll never forget it. That was five years ago. I looked at Psalm 91, and all the passages on each side of the page, because he dwelt there so much, you could see stains from his hands, if that makes sense, of him holding it and studying it so much. So please dwell in it.

The promises of protection in this psalm, I’m just going to read these over you. Think of what you wrote about your hardest fear, what you’re most worried about. These are the truths of what our God does for us, the promises of His protection from Psalm 91.

• If we dwell, that means abide, we’ll rest. 
• He is my refuge. 
• He is my fortress. 
• He will save us from the fowler’s snare. 
• He will cover us with His feathers. 
• Under His wings we will find refuge.
• His faithfulness is my shield and rampart. 

Rampart means a protective barrier. Often people will say, “I pray a hedge of protection around my family.” That’s what a rampart is.

Another promise for us is I will not fear terror, the arrow, pestilence, and plague. If I make the Most High my dwelling, no harm will befall me or disaster come near my tent.

Now, I know that is difficult for some people, that part of the psalm. If I make the Most High my dwelling then no harm will befall you, no disaster will come near your tent. I know a lot of you have had disaster come near your tent, meaning your family.

I remember when our city was hit by extreme fires, and we had to evacuate. I tried clinging to Psalm 91, and I was kind of not real happy with the Lord, because we thought we were going to lose our home. We didn’t, but 300 of our neighbors did, so that is a difficult one. No harm will befall you or come near your tent.

I have a dear friend, though, who had a three-year-old little boy who passed away from complications with strep. She didn’t know Jesus until that happened, and then she found Jesus before her survival. She is one of our authors at Moody and loves Him so dearly. Her name is Kim, and I said, “Kim how do you reconcile ‘No disaster will come near your tent’?”

She said, “Jesus has been my only hope in my grief. He is who I can run to.” She even believes that is talking about eternity—His protection of her soul for eternity.

Another promise in that, is if you make the Most High your dwelling, He will command His angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways.

And then, I will trample the great lion and the serpent. So some of that psalm is obviously, I believe, talking about the enemy.

It was mentioned earlier that I have a book that just came out called The Loudest Roar: Living in the Unshakable Victory of Christ. I dwell in Ephesians 6 and talk a lot about prayer and the armor. I’m going to be teaching that here in a little bit after this one. It is a powerful picture of our God protecting us from the evil one.

And then God’s “I will” statements at the end; please cling to these. It says:

Because he loves Me and acknowledges My name, and calls upon Me, I will rescue, I will protect, I will answer, I will be with in trouble, I will deliver, I will honor, I will satisfy with long life, and I will show her my salvation, which I said is, “Show her Jesus.”

As you dwell in this, you can circle the names of God, you can underline His attributes, you can talk about the promises.

You see some of our part there at the very beginning. “He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.” So how do we dwell? We’ve got to choose that. We’ve got to choose to dwell in Him. That is our part.

We’ve talked about dwelling in the promises of Scripture, but I also want to talk about prayer. I think prayer is one of the most neglected things that we as believers do. It’s hard. I’m not going to do it, but if I had you raise your hand just to say, “Hey, is it hard to have a consistent, meaningful, deep prayer life?” there might not be too many hands, and there’s no condemnation there.

I was on staff at a church. I’ve been in women’s ministry for over twenty years, and I know I get so busy in ministry where I’m leading Bible studies or helping mentor mom ministries get started, or teaching on the importance of prayer, and not really praying.

I think the enemy wants to keep us from prayer more than anything. It’s such a threat to him. But when you’re overwhelmed with anxiety and fear, I want to encourage you to just run to Him in prayer.

I’m going to be talking more about that in the next session where I’m giving creative and practical ways to awaken your prayer life. Just to encourage you, if you’re having a hard time with it, just ask Him. Cry out to Him. Say, “Jesus, I want to pray more. I want to come to Your throne room in prayer more,” and He’ll be faithful in that.

We’re told in Hebrews 4, that the throne of grace, the throne room where we can go to pray, is called a throne of grace and mercy. You can run to Him with whatever your burden is, whatever your fear is.

One of the ways that I try to keep my mind focused on prayer, especially when I’m overwhelmed with anxiety . . . I’ve had to do this several times in my life, and we even taught our daughters to do this. It’s very simple. It’s called the alphabet praise. It’s going through the alphabet thanking God for His names and attributes.

It can help calm your mind. If you can’t fall asleep, or you wake up, try that, where you’re just worshiping Him in prayer.

I’m going to pray over us now just to show you what I’m talking about, and we’re going to lift Him up. Let’s pray.

Oh, Father God, we worship You as the Almighty.

Jesus, You are the Bread of life.
You are compassionate.
You’re our Deliverer.
You’re everlasting.
You are faithful.
You are good.
We worship You as the one who is holy, holy, holy.
You are infinite and just.
You’re our King of kings and Lord of lords.
You are majestic.
You’re near to the broken-hearted.
You’re omnipotent.
You’re powerful.
You quench our thirsty hearts.
You’re our Redeemer.
Jesus, You’re our Savior.
You’re trustworthy.
You understand when we’re overwhelmed with fear.
You’re victorious.
You’re wonderful.
I exalt You.
You’re Yahweh.
You’re zealous for us.

We lift You high in our hearts as we worship You. In Your holy name we pray, amen

Okay, I cheated on the “x.” Did you notice? Exalted. So if you guys have any ideas for an “x,” let me know. But that just gives you an idea of how you can turn to prayer when your anxious heart seems to be taking over.

The next thing that we have to do, another way to cast our anxiety onto God is through worship. I’ve talked a little bit about that already in terms of the alphabet praise. That’s part of worship.

One of the hardest times in my life that I mentioned, I was having a really hard time worshiping Him. I was journaling. I was journaling Psalms that were comforting me, trying to write out my prayers. One day I sensed the Holy Spirit saying to me, “Judy, can you praise Me, even in the midst of this?”

Friends, I was kind of incredulous. I was kind of like, Really? I’m supposed to thank You for all this?! But out of obedience, I started to write thanksgiving in my journal. I would journal a prayer or a Scripture, and then on this side of the page, the left side, I would just write at the top, “Sacrifice of praise” or “Sacrifice of thanksgiving.”

The Psalmist talks about that a lot, and I would just start listing things that I was thankful for. You know, our precious God knew that was going to turn my heart to trusting Him more. It’s just turning to what I could thank Him for. I don’t mean a thank you for the hardest thing I’ve gone through, but thank Him for where He is, what He’s doing for you.

I talked about prayer. Prayer is a gift. It’s a precious gift He’s given us that we take for granted. So I started thanking Him for the privilege of prayer, not matter what I am like when I enter into His presence.

This is a time, too, for worship, when you listen to worship music. There are some incredible worship songs coming out. I have a playlist tied into my book. It’s called “The Loudest Roar Worship,” available on my website.

You can create your own playlist, just to dwell on that. I’ve been doing that a lot, and I did that early this morning as I prepared for our time together. So turn to worship, even in the midst of sorrow. Worship, I believe is a weapon that you can also use against the enemy. The enemy has to leave you alone and flee when we’re worshiping our almighty God.

To begin your time in worship is very important. Not that you have to do that all the time. I had a grandmother who raised five boys on a farm, and she was worried about their safety. They were wild. My dad was in the middle of the five.

She would tell us a story. She was a prayer warrior. You would see her on her knees. Her whole family, all those men who are now in their 80s and 90s, they still talk about their mother covering them in prayer.

But she told us, sometimes when she’d see them racing down the road, she would just see them and go, “Oh God, keep them!” That was her prayer for her boys. Those whispered prayers can be really powerful.

I used to, when I would pray, just jump in, right into my requests, especially when I’m hurting, but I had a prayer partner who really mentored me. When we would pray together, she would want to get on our knees and just begin in worship. Sometimes we’d do that alphabet praise, but also just turn to Him and praise Him for who He is. It’s amazing how that can calm your anxious heart.

So we’ve talked about worship and prayer and God’s Word, but I want to talk about remember. It’s kind of a unique word there, and this comes from Psalm 77. I want to read some of that over us, because what Psalm 77 is, is a prayer, at first, of wrestling and kind of crying out to the Lord and saying that I don’t understand what this is all about.

It was written by Asaph, we’re told. If you look at it, the first half of the psalm is all the heartache and all pouring out, casting that all onto Him. Then there’s a turn, right in the middle of the psalm. It’s like the Psalmist knew that he had to go back. Even though he couldn’t see the goodness of the Lord and His faithfulness, he had to go back to things from the past, and he started to say, “I will remember.”

I just want to read this Psalm over you, again, as you think about your sorrow right now.

I cry aloud to God,
   aloud to God, and he will hear me.
In the day of my trouble I seek the Lord;
   in the night my hand is stretched out without wearying;
   my soul refuses to be comforted.

When I remember God, I moan;
   when I meditate, my spirit faints. Selah
You hold my eyelids open;
   I am so troubled that I cannot speak.

I consider the days of old,
   the years long ago.
I said, “Let me remember my song in the night;
   let me meditate in my heart.”
   Then my spirit made a diligent search:
“Will the Lord spurn forever,
   and never again be favorable?
Has his steadfast love forever ceased?
   Are his promises at an end for all time?
Has God forgotten to be gracious?
   Has he in anger shut up his compassion?” Selah

Then I said, “I will appeal to this,
   to the years of the right hand of the Most High.”
I will remember the deeds of the Lord;
   yes, I will remember your wonders of old.

I will ponder all your work,
   and meditate on your mighty deeds.
Your way, O God, is holy.
   What god is great like our God?

You are the God who works wonders;
   you have made known your might among the peoples.
You with your arm redeemed your people,
   the children of Jacob and Joseph. Selah

When the waters saw you, O God,
   when the waters saw you, they were afraid;
   indeed, the deep trembled.

The clouds poured out water;
   the skies gave forth thunder;
   your arrows flashed on every side.
The crash of your thunder was in the whirlwind;
   your lightnings lighted up the world;
   the earth trembled and shook.

Your way was through the sea,
   your path through the great waters;
   yet your footprints were unseen.
You led your people like a flock
   by the hand of Moses and Aaron.

The writer of this psalm had all that heartache that he’s pouring out to God. Then right in the middle of the psalm, he said, “But I will remember.” He went so far back to where he’s proclaiming what God did for them in going across the Red Sea and escaping Egypt.

That can be what we do. I just encourage you with that.

Now women, I know that many of you are hurting. I wish I could talk to each one of you and see what you wrote down on your paper. I know one thing that a lot of women are dealing with as moms now is a prodigal child. I keep hearing this over and over.

I have a lot of dear friends who their children loved the Lord and then went to college and left Him. Or they’re fifteen and don’t want anything to do with Jesus anymore. If that’s your burden, I want you to borrow my hope.

I have a daughter who, her first year of college, was leaving the Lord. It was breaking my heart, and I was desperately afraid for her. My husband and I prayed for her, and we just didn’t know what was going to happen.

I started to pray that God would capture, fully capture her heart no matter what it took. That’s kind of a dangerous prayer, right? But I kept praying it. She was in a school far from us. She was in northwest Washington, and we were in Colorado.

I was thinking, Do I bring her home? Do I say you can’t go to that college? You can’t date that boy.

I sensed the Holy Spirit whispering over me, “Judy, you’ve been praying that I would capture her heart. I’m working on it, and you need to get out of the way. Just keep praying and be a prayer warrior for her.”

She was like nineteen. I adore her. She’s an amazing young woman.

That summer after her freshman year, she came home. In July, she went to one youth group thing for college students, and she came home a different girl. It was just the worship, the teaching. She came home and wanted to share some of her story with me. To this day, it’s one of the most precious times we’ve ever had!

She’s going to be thirty-one the end of October. She married an incredible young man, and they have two darling little boys. Their oldest boy is called William, which means resolute protector. My daughter’s name is Kelly, which means warrior.

She is a prayer warrior. She’s the one who, when my father died, she called me and prayed over me. She’s the one I text to pray for me. I text my other daughter as well. She is a prayer warrior as well.

Kelly went from where I thought she was leaving the Lord to where she came home to Him. I think her depth of how much she loves Him is even deeper, because she knows why Jesus had to die for her.

I just want to encourage you, praying moms in this room, keep praying! Keep running to Him. Keep casting that anxiety onto Him.

There’s others in this room, I’m sure, who are longing to have a baby. Or you’ve had a child with special needs, and you’re just longing for help with that. Or your afraid your marriage is imploding. You’re not quite sure. Or you have health issues that are scaring you.

I don’t know if you were able to be there last night to hear Coleen’s testimony. I’ll never be the same. If you weren’t able to be there, watch it! She has terminal cancer, a mother of a little boy. What she spoke over us, about Heaven rules, even with terminal cancer took my breath away.

I’m talking about surrender. We talked about worship and remember and surrender—to surrender to whatever God is trying to use through this deep sorrow or this fear that you’re facing.

I mentioned my dad. He is also an author. He wrote the books The Adversary and Overcoming the Adversary. His name’s Mark Bubeck. He served the Lord faithfully for many years. He passed away when he was eighty-nine.

What’s really sweet is I helped update The Adversary before I had the job at Moody. They were going to update the book, so they had me write preface, and I got to help him edit it. That’s how I ended up getting this job at Moody, which I love.

After I started there, I said, “You know, his second book is even better,” because he’s got all this great information on warfare and our protection, prayers that he writes. He teaches on the armor, and it’s called Warfare Praying, if you want to get it. It’s in the ministry center. His name, again, is Mark Bubeck.

While I was preparing this talk I remembered a story he used to tell us when he was a young pastor. I’m just going to read it over you, because it’s a story of surrender. Sometimes God can use our greatest fear to make us more dependent on Him. When we’re weak He’s strong. Also to prepare us to minister to others who are going through what you did.

So just listen to this in terms of surrender.

He writes, “Have you ever lost your sense of peace? What a time of panic, fear, and torment that brings!

A dark time in my life happened in the early years of my marriage. I was in my second year of seminary, taking a full academic load, working part-time and struggling financially to make ends meet.

Suddenly one day, as a result of a minor crisis, something snapped in my emotional well-being, and total panic swept in. Words fail to describe the darkness, the terror that comes to the human soul and spirit when fear begins to rain. God’s servants are not immune from such trials.

Adding to my own trauma was the feeling of dread and humiliation that I was going to have a nervous breakdown. To me, that would be the worst thing that could possibly happen to a young man preparing for the ministry.

This can’t be happening! I’ve never had a nervous day in my life! How can I ever be fit to comfort and counsel others in their spiritual and emotional needs when I’m falling apart?

Thoughts like those were constantly with me. The only way to describe my torment during those days is to say that I was experiencing a total loss of peace. My prayers, though fueled by desperation seemed locked away from God’s ears. The Scriptures, though often read, seemed like dead words to my troubled mind and emotions.

During that time, I learned that one of my professors at my seminary had gone through a similar trial when he had been in seminary. Just knowing that someone else had experienced such a trial and survived comforted me.

With a flicker of hope, I sought him out. He was most understanding and encouraging. I expressed my fear of experiencing a breakdown, perhaps ending my hope of ever being a minister.

With kindness, he spoke words that shocked me into a sudden awareness of truth. He said, “Mark, if God wants you to go through a nervous breakdown, you ought to want to have a nervous breakdown more than anything else in the world!” (Can you imagine that? I have that in bold.)

Those words stopped me. I did not hear anything else that was said. Truth had slain my pride and fear. Excusing myself hurriedly, I made my way home to get alone with God. On the way, I remembered having prayed during a special prayer day at seminary, “Lord, while I’m in seminary, do in my life whatever You see needs doing to prepare me to be a usable servant.”

Those words now rushed back to my consciousness with new insight into what my trauma was all about. I knelt in prayer that afternoon, and for the first time since the trauma began, I felt like I could commune with God.

With quiet surrender I prayed, “Lord, You know I really don’t want to go through a nervous collapse, but if You want me to, then here we go! I’m ready.”

At that moment, I was sure that God was going to take me through such a breakdown, but instead, as I arose from my knees, I noticed a return of at least a portion of inner peace. As I continued to surrender to the Lord’s perfect will, that peace kept growing, and in a few weeks, I was fully recovered.

What great lessons that experience taught me! During that traumatic time, God built within me a tenderness and an understanding for people going through emotional crises that I would never have learned otherwise. He taught me the absolute necessity of full surrender to His will, even if it threatens my own desires, but perhaps the greatest lesson of all was to learn the value and truth of a peace that goes beyond our human understanding.”

I read that over you, because my dad told me that story when I was younger and overwhelmed with fear and anxiety. Our family moved to Beijing, China, where our daughter was sick all the time, and I was overwhelmed, where I thought I could lose my mind. I would cling to that story. I started to pray that same prayer, and I think there is a surrender peace.

What’s beautiful about my father is he was an amazing Biblical counselor, probably one of the most compassionate people I know. I grew up watching him. We had people stay with us who were hurting. He started a ministry called “Deeper Walk,” to provide Biblical counseling to people who were hurting, so that’s part of his legacy.

I really believe it was forged from that surrender and what God taught him through that. He’s a big, tall, strong man, and to have almost a breakdown when he never dealt with anxiety. I do believe part of the reason God let that happen in his life was to create in him a heart for the hurting and an understanding of that.

So, my friends, we’ve talked about the importance of pressing into God. I’m just going to repeat the parts.

Dwell in promises of Scripture.

Prayer. Turn your worries into prayers. I forgot to mention that. That’s something I learned as a mom who was very fearful my girls were going to get cancer or snatched or something. I had that fear come, and I would turn it into a prayer for them, that worry.

Worship Him, even in the midst of the hard.

Remember. If you have to reach back just to remember when He’s been faithful, because you can’t trust Him right now, do that.

And then surrender.

So as you look back at what you wrote on your piece of paper about your greatest fear, I just wondered if you could pick one of those things that we’ve looked at and try working on that. Just pick one for whatever is on your heart and mind, and see what God will do.

You can write even a prayer of commitment, or journal to the Lord. If you have friends here, or even if you want to tell someone you’re sitting by, and you don’t know them, say, “This is what I’m struggling with the most. Will you pray for me?” And have someone pray over you. I have a prayer partner who has prayed for me for years.

I’m just going to give you just two minutes or so to think about that, which one you’re going to pick and then to write on your piece of paper whatever you’d like. It could be a prayer of surrender. It could be like my grandmother, “Lord, help me!” It could be just pouring your heart out to the Lord. Just take two minutes or so.

I’m going to read some Scriptures over you about God and how He comforts us. You know, if you look up on BibleGateway.com and just type in “fear not,” or “do not fear,” or “be not afraid,” it comes up at least 350 times in the Bible. We’re told not to fear, because our God knows there’s a lot to be fearful for.

So as you do that, I’ll just read these over you, and then I’ll pray, and we can let you go.

“Fear not, for I am with you;
   be not dismayed, for I am your God;
I will strengthen you, I will help you,
   I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” (Isa. 41:10)

“Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.” (John 14:27)

John 16:33, Jesus spoke this over His disciples the night He was arrested, right before, in the upper room:

“I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.”

“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” (Josh. 1:9)

When I am afraid,
I put my trust in you.
In God, whose word I praise,
in God I trust; I shall not be afraid. (Psalm 56:3–4)

I’m just going to pray over you now. If you’re writing, you continue to write. Whatever prayer of surrender, or what you’re writing to the Lord, but I’m just going to pray over us.

Oh Lord Jesus, we are so grateful that You chose to walk this groaning earth and to die for us. We’re so grateful that You were tempted in every way we were. You’re such a compassionate, loving, kind God.

Thank You that You’ve asked us to throw our anxiety and our fears and our worries onto You. God, I pray that You would make us women who pray, women who love Your Word and dwell in it and memorize it and savor it, women who choose to praise You, even in the hard things.

May we remember Your faithfulness from the past that gives us hope for the future. Thank You that You guard and protect us. You’re like a rampart around us. You hem us in from all sides.

So, Lord, I thank You that You know what each woman is wrestling with or hurting, or her greatest fear. I pray that You’ll calm her anxious heart and draw her ever closer to You. You are our only hope. We want to trust You. We love You, and we thank You for this time together.

In Your mighty and holy name, yet very personal name, we pray, amen