The Day After Disappointment

The flower deliveries, happy couples, and messages of (romantic) love that permeated yesterday might have gotten the best of you. Maybe you attempted to ignore it all, but today you find yourself disappointed and lonely. If you’re in a crisis marriage or season of singleness, yesterday might just have put the exclamation point on your current struggles: feeling unappreciated, unloved, with no hope of being fought for, affirmed, or having tenderness expressed toward you.

It’s Supposed to Be About Love, Not Rejection

The pain you face every day seems quite enough without being reminded that you don’t have the husband you hoped for. If you’re married, maybe you are alone in your faith so you cannot even express or share your love for the Lord within your home. Perhaps the very man who promised to love and honor you has rejected or abused you.

But God understands. When He proclaimed His self-description to Moses on Mount Sinai as told in Exodus 34:6, we get a picture of God’s heart toward His children:

“The LORD, the LORD, a God merciful and gracious, slow to anger, and abounding in steadfast love and faithfulness.”

The image of God in this passage is one of compassion, mercy, and grace. God understands the weariness of your heart like no one else can. He knows yesterday was hard for you; He knows every day can be a struggle as you navigate through this season of brokenness. He cares about you, whether single or married. He sees and hears and knows what is going on and the condition of the hearts within your relationships.

He is not a far-off, distant God who is only watching you, waiting to see how you will respond. He is intimate with you and within your everyday life. As the above passage states, He is abounding in steadfast love. His love for you is as strong on the days you are praising Him as on the days it’s difficult to crawl out of bed. No matter your status—single, married, divorced, widowed, separated—God’s love for you never changes. Where you are right now, He loves you perfectly, just as you are.

He Will Be Faithful to Your Wounded Heart

Not only is He abounding in His love but also in His faithfulness toward you. That matters! Hebrews 13:5 tells us that He will never leave nor forsake you. That means never, ever—no matter the circumstance, how shattered your life may seem, or hopeless your marriage may feel. The fact that there is nothing about God that depends upon you is something that you can hope in and place your faith in.

But just as the realities of this fallen world will be deeply felt at times, there is a remedy for every single sorrow and every single tear. Christ has overcome the world, sin, death, your selfishness, loneliness, broken lives, and messy marriages. There will come a day when the ache of your soul will be no more. He will be faithful to heal you completely when you find yourself fully in His presence.

You’ve Got 365 Days Until the Next One

Wouldn’t it be glorious if next Valentine’s Day you didn’t find yourself in the same state even if your circumstances don’t change? What if you spent the next year in pursuit of one thing that would change every aspect of your life?

Loving others is meant to bring us joy. However, at some point in time, people will disappoint or sin against you. There is only one relationship where you will never know rejection, loss, or fear—a relationship with Christ.

Not only is He compassionate, gracious, and abounding in love and faithfulness toward you, He also created you. He knows your gifts, talents, passions, weaknesses, and strengths. He understands your history and your sorrows; He offers you a future that no one else can. Pursuing intimacy with Christ above all else will give a right perspective to your circumstances. It may still be hard, but God will be faithful to lead you and give you discernment and wisdom if you ask.

Don’t Find Yourself Here Again

There will be many opportunities over the coming months to find yourself discouraged because your marriage is struggling or the relationship you want hasn’t come. Decide today that you will choose to pursue the Lord and His ways, trusting that He will be faithful to heal and restore. (If your situation involves a marriage where there is physical abuse, don’t wait one more day to reach out for help. Tell someone immediately if you have legitimate fear and need.)

No matter how dire today seems, God has a purpose and plan for you. He’s calling you into an intimacy that is ever increasing, which will result in peace and rest for your wounded and wearied soul. Take the time to contemplate and memorize Scriptures like those below that speak of God’s unfailing faithfulness:

He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will abide in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say to the LORD, “My refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust” (Ps. 91:1–2).

For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord (Rom. 8:38–39).

Nevertheless, I am continually with you; you hold my right hand. You guide me with your counsel, and afterward you will receive me to glory (Ps. 73:23–24).

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God (2 Cor. 1:3–4).

O LORD God of hosts, who is mighty as you are, O LORD, with your faithfulness all around you? (Ps. 89:8).

Make it a daily practice to consider God’s love that is perfect and complete for you, just as you are. Ask Him to help you believe that the same self-description He gave to Moses is also meant for you. You are His beloved every single day, and that far outweighs any earthly, man-created Valentine’s Day.

About the Author

Joy McClain

Joy McClain

Joy is the author of Waiting for His Heart: Lessons from a Wife Who Chose to Stay. Married to her beloved for over three decades, Joy and her husband are passionate about discipling the wearied and wounded in the context … read more …

Join the Discussion