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Daily Program

Women in the Church

Series: The Attractive Christian Woman

Tuesday, June 6 2006

Leslie Basham: Here’s Nancy Leigh DeMoss.

Nancy Leigh DeMoss: Women in the church can either be a great blessing or they can do incredibly great damage. They can make the Gospel believable, or they can cause people to turn away from Christ.

Leslie Basham: It’s Tuesday, June 6, and you're listening to Revive Our Hearts with Nancy Leigh DeMoss.

Let's join Nancy as she begins a new series called The Attractive Christian Woman.

Nancy Leigh DeMoss: I want to start a series today on what I think is one of the most important New Testament passages, perhaps one of the most important passages in all of God's Word for us as women.

It's one of those passages that speaks directly and specifically to us as women. As I've been studying these two verses, I've found just a wealth of not only information but material that is transforming my own heart, my life, and my thinking as I've been studying it.

In fact, even late last night I found the Lord really using this passage to challenge my own heart and to bring conviction and to show me areas that really need to change in my own walk with the Lord.

So I want to share with you some fresh thoughts that have been on my heart in relation to 1 Timothy 2:9-10. You may want to turn there if you have your Bible. We're going to spend several sessions just looking at these two verses and unpacking what it has to say for us as women.

If we want to be counter-cultural women, these are the verses that tells us how to do it. I want to give you a context in this first session for this passage and show you where it fits and give you an overview. Then, in the next few sessions we'll look at it a phrase at a time.

The context here in the book of First Timothy is that the apostle Paul is giving Timothy, who is pastor of the church in Ephesus, he is giving instructions for the church. Particularly in this segment he is talking about instructions for the church family when they come together for worship, the official assembly of the church.

Now, what he is going to say here applies outside the official assembly of the church as well. Specifically, he is talking about how men and women ought to behave at church; what they ought to do. And then when we leave church, we don't want to leave these attitudes and behaviors behind.

He is saying when God's people come together, it's really important that they understand that there are some distinct instructions for men and for women. We are different. We have different roles and different functions in the Body of Christ. If we follow these distinct instructions for men and for women, then God will be glorified, our churches will prosper, and the gospel will go forth.

But if we neglect to be the women we are supposed to be in the church and if men fail to be the men they are supposed to be in the church, the cause of Christ will be damaged, and we will bring reproach on the name of Christ. So it's very important that we understand and live out what it means for us to be women of God in the church.

First, in verse eight (and I am just going to touch on this), he talks to the men about what they ought to do and be like at church. He talks to the men about leading in prayer. He says in verse 8, "I desire then that in every place the men should pray, lifting holy hands without anger or quarreling."

This is not to say that women should not pray or that it's okay for women to be angry or to quarrel. He is saying that when the church comes together for worship, for its official assembly, men (the word there is men as opposed to women, it is not like mankind in general, this is the males in the group), men are intended to be the ones who provide spiritual leadership. They are intended to be the leaders when the church meets for corporate worship.

He deals here with the actions or the behavior of the men and with their attitudes, as he is going to do in just a moment with the women. He says as far as actions and behavior are concerned, they should "lift up holy hands."

That is talking about their behavior. They should be unpolluted and unstained by evil. Then he talks about their attitudes toward others. They should be "without anger or quarreling."

Now, neither men nor women are to be angry or quarrelsome. But I think, perhaps, one of the reasons Paul mentions this here may be that men are more prone to be angry or quarrelsome. So he traces the area of their potential weakness, just as he is going to do in a moment with us as women.

He moves on in verses 9 and 10 to talk to women about (not their actions first this time). First he talks about their appearance, what they should wear. He talks to men about how they should pray, and he talks to women about how they should dress.

That is the first item he brings up on his agenda for women in church. He talks to women about their appearance or their attire, and then he talks to them about their attitudes, and then he talks to them about their actions.

We're going to look at each of these in the next few days. He says that the way these women dress is a reflection of their heart and their character. If they have right attitudes, that will produce a right appearance. What I think he is saying is that you can't separate the inward from the outward.

We say, "God looks on the heart. That means the way I dress doesn't matter." No, because God looks on the heart. The way we dress does matter because the way we dress is intended to be a reflection of our hearts.

So Paul says, in 1 Timothy 2:9 and 10, "Likewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel," that's their appearance; now their attitudes, "with modesty and self-control."

Now it goes back to touch on the specifics of the appearance. "Not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly attire, but with what is proper for women who profess godliness—with good works."

Women are to be clothed not only with modest or decent apparel and clothing, but also with good works. So he is making reference to their appearance, their attitudes and their actions. He is calling us as women to take our proper place in the church.

Let's just look at that first sentence. "Women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control." Let me read that in a few different translations because the Bibles that you have may translate it differently.

The NIV says that women should "dress modestly with decency and propriety." Or, if you have a New American Standard, it says that women should "adorn themselves with proper clothing, modestly and discreetly."

The New King James that I often use says that women should "adorn themselves in modest apparel, with propriety and moderation." Or if you are using the King James, the Authorized Version, it has an interesting phrase in here. It says that women should "adorn themselves in modest apparel with shamefacedness and sobriety."

Now, before we go into all the details of those words and phrases, I want to look at the bottom line at the end of this verse. The explanation, the motivation for all of this, Paul says, "This is what is proper [or suitable] for women who profess godliness."

The NIV says this is what is "appropriate for women who profess to worship God."

What is he saying by all these phrases? He is saying that being this kind of woman in appearance, in attitudes, and in actions is how you prove that you are a child of God.

This is how you demonstrate your profession of faith. It is tragic to me how many people we have in our churches, men and women, who profess to be Christians but give no evidence. They don't dress like Christians. They don't have Christian attitudes, and they don't act like Christians.

Paul says, "If you want people to believe your profession of faith, if you claim to be a Christian, then you better demonstrate it by having these things in place. This is the evidence of your true heart and your character. You can't separate the two."

Who you are and what you are will come out in the way that you look, the way that you act, and the attitudes that you demonstrate toward other people. Think about it in a sort of reverse way. Can you imagine Madonna dressing in respectable apparel with modesty and self-control?

I mean, can you imagine Madonna looking that way? No. Why not? Because she doesn't profess godliness. She dresses in a way that is suitable, or appropriate, for what she believes. She dresses and conducts herself in a way that is consistent with her value system, with her belief system, with her profession.

In the same way, it should be equally unthinkable for a woman or a girl who claims to worship God not to wear respectable apparel and not to exhibit modesty and self-control.

If you claim to worship God, if you claim to be a Christian, then your appearance, your attitudes—the way you treat other people, the way you treat your husband and your children when they are getting on your nerves, your attitudes at work and at church, your actions—they need to support your claim to be a child of God.

I want to say that women in the church can be either a great blessing or they can do incredibly great damage. They can make the gospel believable, or they can cause people to turn away from Christ.

You see, these two verses matter for us as Christian women so that we will learn how to dress ourselves in respectable apparel and to be clothed in the attitudes of modesty and self-control and that our actions would be those of good works.

So, over these next few days, we are going to examine these two verses phrase by phrase and we are going to ask ourselves, "Do you measure up to this standard? Is this the kind of Christian woman you are? Does your life support your profession of faith? Is it consistent with what you say you believe?"

Leslie Basham: That's Nancy Leigh DeMoss asking us some tough questions about how our outer life reflects the inner life. We hope you will spend some more time with this topic and order "The Attractive Christian Woman" package.

It includes Nancy’s booklet The Look and the booklet Becoming a Woman of Discretion. Both booklets will help you to develop a heart of modesty. The package also includes this current series on CD.

You can order "The Attractive Christian Woman" package for a donation of $25. Just visit ReviveOurHearts.com.

While you're there, you can donate to the ministry of Revive Our Hearts. We are a listener-supported ministry, which means that we need your financial gifts and your prayers to keep these programs on the air. Here’s Nancy to tell us more.

Nancy: One of the great joys in my life is the privilege of giving out of the financial resources that God has entrusted to me. I consider it not only a privilege but also a biblical responsibility to invest financially in those people and ministries who have helped me in my spiritual growth.

I am so thankful for the many people that God has raised up who hve that same heart and who say, as a woman said to me on the phone last night, "I am so thankful for the privilege of being able to invest in the ministry of Revive Our Hearts,” believing that this message is needed and that God wants to use us all over this country.

In order for Revive Our Hearts to continue in your community, we need to hear from more people who share this vision and the burden that God has put on our hearts. I want to encourage you, if God is using this ministry in your life, to write to me today at Revive Our Hearts.

Tell us how God is using the program. Tell us the station where you listen to Revive Our Hearts, and then if God prompts you, would you enclose a financial contribution and say, "I want this ministry to continue in my community and in communities all across this country"?

Leslie Basham: You can send your gifts to Revive Our Hearts, P.O. Box 2000, Niles, MI 49120. Or to contact us more quickly, donate online at ReviveOurHearts.com. 

You can still write to Nancy. Just click where it says “Contact”.

On tomorrow's program we'll find out that when it comes to clothing, we really should wear things inside out. Find out more on Revive Our Hearts.

Revive Our Hearts with Nancy Leigh DeMoss is an outreach of Life Action Ministries.

All Scripture is taken from the English Standard Version unless otherwise noted.

 

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Read and post comments about: Women in the Church

*The following comments do not necessarily reflect the views of Revive Our Hearts. We reserve the right to remove comments which might be unhelpful, unsuitable, or inappropriate.

 

"Well Nancy, such a tough topic to discuss, and one that has been on my own heart for quite a while lnow. I have recently been convicted of how I dress-as a farmwife, I have been quite comfortable in jeans, tshirts, etc, and for my work, I still dress that way, but for church, and even around the home, skirts, jump[ers and dresses are becoming the norm for me, although it is a battle of the flesh some days-no shorts, no tank tops, nothing tight or form fitting-
It is appalling what people will wear to church in the name of grace-or rebellion-I am quite sick of jeans and tshirts on women-
Bod Bless you as you stand for modestly dressed Christian women
I will be anxious to read the next few days' transcripts to see what unfolds.
Chris"

Chris (on Tuesday, June 6, 2006 at 5:41 AM)

"I have noticed a lot of people dressing very wordly in church. Too revealing . I know it does correlate with heart attitude. I have overlooked this to some degree because I keep telling myself "God is not done with them yet. " "

Lisa (on Tuesday, June 6, 2006 at 7:55 AM)

"As a mother of young adult women, I have found that other women have pushed them away from the church by their judgemental and subjective attitudes towards clothes. I was hoping you would talk about the ugly attitudes that ultimately repel people . I think we've heard quite enough about modest dress and not enough about haughty, cruel and judgemental attitudes."

Pam (on Tuesday, June 6, 2006 at 8:49 AM)

"I agree with Pam about not having a judgemental & cruel attitude. We have to have the same spirit of Christ when He was on the cross. He said to His father: "Forgive them for they know not what they do". Many women are blind to this truth about dress. We, who have been enlightened by God's Spirit , should be the change we want to see in others and pray that God will open their eyes to the truth of modesty. Let's remember to behold Christ in all of His beauty. Let's not dwell on the shortcomings of others. God's not finished with them yet. But for the grace of God there goes I and the rest of us. "

Karen (on Tuesday, June 6, 2006 at 9:12 AM)

"Thank you for this important teaching. It reminds me of the phrase "wearing you heart on your sleeve". There is a touch of humor in that sleeves are not even around much these days! Seriously, some in the church may be "judgmental" but I believe many others are seriously concerned! I am more aware of this because I have to teenage sons. Some of the girls must be totally unaware of how a man is wired! I'm very glad you are addressing the issue."

Cindy (on Tuesday, June 6, 2006 at 9:19 AM)

"A lot of young girls are enjoying the trends of the day in their dress. Which is more revealing that it used to be. While so many are being influenced by culture young women need to realize that coming together to worship is a time to focus on Christ and not draw attention to themselves. Men are very visual and my husband is always commenting on the distraction some cause with their dress revealing too much. God's not done yet with anyone or we would be in heaven but we can state the truth and not overlook it"

Lisa (on Tuesday, June 6, 2006 at 9:25 AM)

"I don't feel enough is being said about standards of dress in the church anymore. It's like people (especially women) do not want anyone telling them what to do or how to dress. Romans 12:1,2 gives us the answer to that...I believe it says something about presenting our bodies to the Lord as a holy and acceptable sacrifice and then about not conforming to the world but being transformed by the renewing of our mind. I think Christian women need to turn off the TV and get rid of the Vogue magazines and get back to the Bible. Thanks, Nancy...This is a much needed issue to be discussed. God bless you...Jodi"

Jodi (on Tuesday, June 6, 2006 at 1:21 PM)

"What a great reminder... whether we eat or drink or dress, we ought to do it unto the Lord. We ought to dress to please our Savior, not others -- or even ourselves.

In this day of immodest dress, it's easy to get caught up in the same fashion trends that we see on others around us -- esp. in Southern California.

But I thank God for your message today and the encouragement not to be conformed to the world -- to take a stand and dress modestly. May the Lord grow modesty and humility in my heart so that I can dress modestly with a sincere heart."

Jeena (on Tuesday, June 6, 2006 at 2:00 PM)

"I would have to quite strongly disagree with Pam and Karen's comments. While I appreciate the value in being careful not to judge others, as a youth minister's wife for several years (and a strong advocate of purity in ALL aspects of our lives), I can assure you that women of ALL ages are not "blind to this truth about dress," know EXACTLY what they are doing, and in fact feel power on some level in being able to turn heads, even during church services when the focus is to be on Him. I am EXCITED that Nancy Leigh DeMoss is teaching more on how we can present God's Truth on this subject. I have continued to instruct the young women in our church regularly of how absolutely clear God's Word is in regard to His desire for us to "make up our minds to not put any stumbling block in our brother's way" (Romans 14:13) and to present our bodies as a holy sacrifice (Romans 12:1). It is heartbreaking to see how often churches and parents remain silent on this issue and allow our brothers in Christ to be forced to battle this when in the presence of "Christian" women."

Stacy (on Tuesday, June 6, 2006 at 2:28 PM)

"Thank you, Nancy for this needed series. I want to "understand and live out what it means for us to be women of God in the church....and when I leave the church. Thanks for your stand!!! "

Linda (on Tuesday, June 6, 2006 at 3:02 PM)

"Pam and Karen's comments are true in the fact that a judgemental spirit is just as replusive to the Lord as a godly woman's inmodest dress. I don't believe Nancy was overlooking this fact. But let's keep in mind that the series has just started and the issue of adorning ourselves with good works hasn't been addressed yet. It takes a humble heart to receive truth and allow the Scriptures to pierce one's heart. Purity in heart, speech and dress refelcts a woman who has surrendered her will to the cross. I thank you Nancy for bearing your cross and contending earnestly for the faith!"

Jennifer (on Tuesday, June 6, 2006 at 4:21 PM)

"It has been of recent that I have been complimented several times at work about being a Christain. many people have told me they can tell I am a Christain, but I wear scrubs so I know it has nothing to do with my attire that they say this. I do believe that women should not be dressing skantily ANYWHERE, being tempted by this huge "sex" epidemic that is just lowering the self esteem of those who participate, and those women who look on as the men in their lives are targeted. However, I have been known to wear jeans in church, mainly beacuse I have very little money to buy new clothes, and three toddlers to watch after in church.( I would rather not bend over in a dress when tracking down my kids ;) ) And I have felt judged and uncomfortable because of others who visibly don't approve of my attire, my kids, etc at church. which disappoints me greatly! I always have claimed " it's not what you wear it's that you're there" because I think God would rather want anyone and everyone to attend and focus on Him, than worry about if I'm pleasing the congregation. If God wants to reach people about their dress, then we all know He has the power to do it ,and that is their journey to take with the Lord, not ours to judge."

Erin (on Tuesday, June 6, 2006 at 6:56 PM)

" Many younger women in the Church are dressing too casual and like the culture. I believe that they do not know what Scripture says. Keep these Scriptures before us Nancy. May God give the Spiritual mothers in the churches "His" words as they speak to the younger women and guide these women gently in a godly direction and a more modest way of dress. "

Gloria (on Tuesday, June 6, 2006 at 8:48 PM)

"I would like to thank Jennifer for her Christlike spirit in responding to my and Pam's comment. Your comment was balanced and tactful. Thank you again. Thank you Revive Our Hearts for addressing this topic. May God give us His view and His spirit when dealing with ourselves and others. "

Karen (on Tuesday, June 6, 2006 at 9:15 PM)

"I have to say I agree with you Stacy for the most part, however, one scripture seems to be continually ignored regarding this issue. Why aren't we calling the men to pluck out their eyes if they cause them to stumble as Jesus taught in Matt 18:9? I'm not saying women should dress sleezey, but men need to take some responsibility for their lusting attitudes. Instead of putting all the blame on the women why don't the men check their hearts and ask the Lord for self-control, that is a fruit of the spirit for men too, right Nancy?"

Kris (on Thursday, June 29, 2006 at 2:36 AM)

"We have used this tape series in our church plant here in Guyana and it has been a blessing. It addresses the issue of modesty so well - not giving a list of clothing that we must wear ("Ladies, put on your bonnets, ankle-length skirts, cape dresses and black stockings" !) but addressing the heart as most important. The heart of modesty is wanting to glorify God and not have any part in causing someone to sin, or as John MacArthur says, being ashamed that I might ever cause anyone to think an illicit thought or distract them from worship. Oh that Christian young ladies would think beyond themselves when they get dressed, and see their bodies as tools for God's service and not figure advertisements.

God bless you, Nancy, as you teach His truth"

Alyssa (on Friday, July 14, 2006 at 11:31 AM)

"Also, I would comment on Kris's post:
There are many people who are addressing this issue of men guarding their eyes. The Bible says that women are not to teach or have authority over men. As Nancy is speaking only to women, it seems best that she would challenge them to do their part.
There are some great books written for men on this subject by Joshua Harris, Randy Alcorn and others.
We ought not regard men as helpless beasts who have no control over their bodies. They are responsible. While we seek to dress modestly, we should also pray for the men, because there is alot of skin showing out there, even if it's not ours, and they need to be strong in the Lord."

Alyssa (on Friday, July 14, 2006 at 11:42 AM)

"Firstly, with regards to judging and not judging people. Paul writes, I think in Colossians, that as Christians it IS our responsibility to judge those in the church, and NOT our responsibility for us to judge non-christians. So based on that, I think its only right that young women be taught and even reprimanded if needed. On the contrary, I am a young woman who goes to a church at my school. There's just about 30 of us on Sunday. For the convenience of school and church and my wardrobe of only 1 dress, I usually wear jeans and a t-shirt. The only amount of skin seen by the sun are my fore-arms and face. Is this inappropriate dressing? I'd appreciate any input."

Renee (on Saturday, September 15, 2007 at 12:23 AM)

"Interesting. First, I'd like to make a comment about the men 'lifting holy hands in prayer.' Nancy, you equate this with God saying that men 'are intended to be the leaders when the church meets for corporate worship. '

I have a King James, women's study Bible and it just says that the statement 'I will therefore that men pray, everywhere, lifting up holy hands, without wrath & doubting' means: men are to lead audibly in public prayer; women are to pray silently. This directive remains the same "in every locality," geography being no factor. The manner in which men are to pray is that of LIFTING UP HOLY HANDS, that is, with a pure life, which is WITHOUT WRATH AND DOUBTING (disputes).'

Now, that's not telling me that men are to be leaders when church is in session. Especially, since Priscilla was a church leader herself and, with her husband, started many churches, and even, again with her husband, instructing Apollos (a man) on Christ. I believe that if God equips a woman, such as He did with Priscilla, to be a 'church leader,' then she should be a church leader. I don't believe that women should be Pastors & I'm guessing that Priscilla was 'under' her husband, though the scriptures never say that. In fact, they list her name first 3 of the 6 times the two are mentioned.

Anyway, I believe that a man should be the top leader of a church but that women have leadership roles in church services, too.

2nd, I'd like to make a comment about dressing for church. I'm not a curvaceous woman, but I have been called 'sexy.' Therefore, I usually wear jeans & tshirts to shirt so as not to accentuate my body. I don't believe God finds this disrespectful of Him at all. I'm reminded of a song: Just as I am, without one plea; but that Thy blood, was shed for me. I've known non-Christian women who dress very modestly, conservatively but didn't know Christ at all. But then there have been homeless women, wearing filthy clothes that don't fit properly, who have a love of Christ. We are to dress modestly because the Bible tells us so, but I don't believe our dress is what shows people we're Christians. It's our heart. Where Christ lives, He makes it beautiful, makes it shine. Without Christ, it won't matter how modestly you dressed. People probably wouldn't mistake you for a Christian. I don't believe I'm conforming to the world by wearing jeans to church. If I were conforming to the world, I'd be wearing revealing, provactive clothing. I have, in the past, done that & God convicted me of it.

Anyway, that's just my two-cents' worth. Nancy, as you challenge me, I hope that I am challenging you. :)

God bless you."

Mikki (on Sunday, October 26, 2008 at 3:14 AM)

"Hmmmm. This is the exact same message from yesterday. I hope we get a new one for today. :)

Have a wonderful evening.

God bless you."

Mikki (on Sunday, October 26, 2008 at 10:02 PM)

"I think Nancy is right on the money when it comes to dressing modestly. I know I've been guilty of dressing to attract the wrong kind of attention but I am so much more aware of it now especially since having a husband who struggled for years with pornography. Women and teen girls need to be encouraged to dress modestly even if the "encouragement" is in the form of a loving rebuke. Sometimes we use the "do not judge" excuse to a fault. Sin is sin and dressing immodestly especially for sexual attraction is sin. Ladies please resist the temtation to do that."

Tara (on Thursday, December 4, 2008 at 9:38 AM)

"I've read most of the blog comments on the above issue and I can say some folks have serious heart issues and they don't even know it. Why is it that women question what the Bible says but doesn't think twice about wearing something that a secular magazine suggests. It's like out minds are not renewed spiritually...Romans 12:2 - When a person is saved (really saved), you have to change your mind about a lot of things - sometimes about a lot of good things - or what seems to you to be good. Proverbs says that there's a way that "seems" right to a man but the end is destruction. No man/woman has any right tell another person how to dress but God does (especially if you call Him "Lord"). If an individual is giving instruction from the scriptures (and ladies, there is not a hard word in this passage to understand - most of these words are elementary), there should not be an argument from any Christian woman. I think it was Jesus that said "Why callest thou me "Lord" and do not the things which I say?" Something to think about."

Jodi (on Thursday, February 5, 2009 at 9:58 AM)

"Hi,Nancy
This has been a pain in my side for a very long time, because some women who claims to be christians just don't care how they dress. I read something a few years ago by Taffi Dollar titled: "Don't Be A Stumbling Block." She posed a question to christian women: To whose image are you conforming? One of her statements was: Don't allow yourself to be a stumbling block to another's spiritual growth. As a believer it is our Christian duty not to assist our brothers in Christ - who are striving to live a life of purity - to fall prey to temptation. We as women need to be sensitive to the struggles men face on a daily basis to rid their lives of lustful thoughts & desires.
As a believer we as women can dress fashionably & sensibly without conforming to the world's way of dressing.

This teaching is so needed & relevant today

God bless"

Beverley (on Friday, March 13, 2009 at 6:19 AM)

"The subject of dress is preached very strongly in our church-most of all the women wear dresses not just to services but all the time. While I enjoy dressing up, clothing that fits properly, jewelry that compliments rather than to flatter or disrupt, make up that brings out natural beauty and is not clownish etc, etc. I do this for my husband and not to get the attention of any brother in Christ. We're an active family and take pleasure in exercise, outdoor activities, sports for health purposes and I've experienced such a vile response when seen outside of church in my workout clothes (that do not reveal my knees!) that I've been alienated by my church "sisters" most would not speak to me if I'm in sweats and t shirt- at HEB Is this a Chistlike spirit? even though they dress the part they certainly don't walk the walk when actions like this are experienced. I've taught my girls nothing but purity and modesty, there's absosutley nothing in their closet that I've seen in a check out stand magazines but they've been outcasted because they wear jeans to a game or to the grocery store by their "sisters in Christ" so my everyday lesson for them is that Jesus, not anywhere in the Bible, imposed, command a dress code for his disciples nor did he ever turn a soul away because of what they were wearing, those were the pharisees. We still have them today, they sit in their high places looking down at others so our family has -by God's guidance- decided that we will not be as such and we'd rather sit with the sinners and the publicans so that we may win some to the Lord, but for grace- I'm just a sinner saved by grace. These actions I suppose are heart issues in it's deepest root, lacking of love: He that loveth not knoweth not God (I John 4:8) . Women are beautiful in the sight of the Lord who reverence Him and not man. Man's eyes are never satisfied, a man will look at a nun. Let's be pleasing unto the Lord. Our love for others and for Christ should be clearly seen not only in our appearance but most importantly how we treat others. Unbelievers should know us by our love of one another, clothed in rightousness rather than filthy rags (pharaseecal attitudes)
Our appearance says alot to others, dress or lack of dress speaks volumes without using a word, apron of leaves were not enough for Adam and Eve, skin coats had to be made BY GOD, an animal had to die, blood had to shed.
Our Christain task is to share the gospel, -plant a seed, let God water- not to be the Holy Spirit. Whether we like it or not we will be judged by all about the way we look, but can we show our insides?. We may look like our very best on Sunday but how are we on Monday?"

Chartley (on Monday, April 27, 2009 at 1:05 PM)

"First of all thank you Nancy for this! I really enjoyed reading what you had to say.
I have been brought up in a very strict church.I have never worn pants in my life as that was taught as sin. A few years ago we left that church and over the years of being "shunned" etc we have really studied God Word to find out for ourselves what the Bible has to say on some of the issues ie : pants, cutting hair, etc. We have been told we are no longer Christian because we are not in "the church" and also since we are considering pants etc.
My question is this I have such a stuggle with the thought of wearing pants because I have been taught that they are sin for women to wear.How much of the old church do I throw out and how much do I keep? I pray God will keep helping me.My heart is open to Him. I don't have a desire to be anything but a Christian. Any help on this issue would be great."

Rachelle (on Monday, June 29, 2009 at 9:09 PM)

admin signature"Dear Rachelle,

I hope you will permit me to answer your question. Although Miss DeMoss reads most of the comments and emails that come through our ministry, time does not allow for her to personally reply to each one.

Scripture speaks clearly on many vital issues. On the issue of dress it is clear as well:

"Your adornment must not be merely external -- braiding the hair and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses; but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God." 1 Peter 2:3-4

"Likewise, I want women to adorn themselves with proper clothing, modestly . . . " 1 Timothy 2:9

Scripture gives us the instruction that we should focus more on our inner character than our outer adornment. We are to wear "proper" and modest clothing.

To state that, "it is a sin for a woman to wear pants" seems to be adding more detail than what the Scripture gives as an admonition. We need always be careful that we don't twist Scriptural principles into personal absolutes.

"Proper" clothing for a woman may mean that we should be easily distinguished as a modest female. Our clothing should not cause someone to wonder about our gender, or cause someone to stumble in lust.

I pray you will continue to seek God's Word for His views. You are blessed if you've found a church that will instruct and equip you to live out the gospel in this very dark culture.

I hope this helps!"

Kimberly Wagner (on Monday, June 29, 2009 at 9:35 PM)

"Thank you Kimberly for your response. I 'm pretty sure on of my BIGGEST stuggles is knowing what some of my family and friends will think and I want everyone to think well of me and like me. I know that we are not to worry about what people think or say , but there is a ton of pressure.If I do wear pants around these people they feel you are "just putting it in their face and so sinful" if you don't wear them around them and they know you wear pants then "it because you are convicted when you are around them" You really cannot win:) I have prayed about this for awhile and also short sleeves, rings, makeup etc.I have not felt God saying no but I feel guilty when I see these people. I'm really trying to come out on top.
Thanks again for your help!!"

Rachelle (on Tuesday, June 30, 2009 at 9:56 AM)

"Rachelle,

I grew up in a very strict household. My daddy was a Baptist preacher and we held some very high standards. I today do not keep all of the same standards that I was raised with, but I do for the most part wear dresses and skirts out in public. In my home I may wear pants to ride a bike , work in the garden or to do some hard house cleaning. I have four boys and I want to be modest for them. Appropriateness is always a good thing to keep in mind when getting dressed in the morning. Something that my parents taught me was that if I am in the company of someone who has higher standards than I do I should out of love follow the higher standard. I apply this to my life today. So if I am going to be around people who perfer to wear skirts and dresses I honor their higher standard and wear a skirts or dress. God has blessed me and I don't do it just for the love of the people but a love for my Saviour. If people are judging you for your attire and you are judging them for improper attitude who is at fault? You both are judging. The bible says , "Judge not, that ye be not judged." So my advice to you is that if you are going to be with people who would perfer you to be in a dress then wear a dress. It wil be a good testimony, we as Christians should honor one another. Whatever we do, we should to it to glorify Christ not man. Don't get the attitude that you have to prove to the people from your old church that you can be a Christian and wear pants. They won't listen and you will only frustrate yourself. Love your Lord and Saviour and the matter of attire will come naturally. Giving God all the glory, Debby"

Debby (on Friday, August 28, 2009 at 12:26 PM)

"I am thankful for Nancy, and also for Gloria's comment about younger women. I am 22 and newly married. The Lord saved my (now) husband and I about 6 years ago out of very dark and very secular upbringing/living. I was never taught about modesty, and was actually taught that Paul's addresses to women ought not to be interpreted literally or with cultural relevance. I wear both pants and skirts and I cover myself, and who knows what I will wear in 5 years. But I just wanted to encourage all of the ear older women in the Church that God is speaking to the hearts of the young ones that are indoctrinated with immodesty, sexual appeal, and feminism. We are hungering for obedience and conformity to the image of Christ as the Lord gives grace and discipline. Please reach out to us as the Spirit leads. We need you, just as Paul knew we would when he wrote Titus 2. If the Holy Spirit has graciously indwelt and led believers for over 2000 years, we can certainly trust Him to lead us in this area and others, in His gracious patience and providence. Thank you so much to all of you who are being obedient to the Scriptures and the Spirit. It blesses the Church and causes her great good."

Amanda (on Tuesday, September 8, 2009 at 9:44 AM)

"Debby,
Thanks for your note. While I do not feel that I have judge my former church you maybe took it that way.I know this is how they feel as I was raised in it and know . I can see that we have to be careful, but other Christians should give you room to grow in Christ. There is always going to be people that have a "higher standard" than we do. If we went to see the Amish should we dress like they do?
Rachelle"

Rachelle (on Friday, September 25, 2009 at 2:24 PM)

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