One Thing Every Pastor's Wife Can Give

There are times as a pastor's wife when I feel overwhelmed and ill-equipped.

Before I write more, it's worth saying that I love being my pastor's wife, and there is no church in the whole world where I'd rather belong. But there are times when God connects my path with someone in our church family who needs help and encouragement, and I feel as though I'm not holy enough, available enough, or wise enough to speak the words that need to be heard.

To put it plainly, sometimes I feel inadequate as a pastor's wife. Maybe you know that feeling.

Looking to Christ and remembering who we are in Him is everything!

A few days back, my phone beeped, and I glanced down to see a text from a loved one in our family of faith asking me to pray for a particular situation that was unfolding in her life. I sat down on my couch and, as I prayed, I felt ineffective and unable to help this girl, though my lips formed the right words.

I continued praying for my friend, but I was distracted by what felt like waves of inadequacy. All my failures, all my sin, all the ways that I'm not godly enough or don't pray faithfully enough were crashing upon me.

"God, sometimes I feel so weak, so frail, so unable to truly help people. Sometimes, I wonder why people even come to me with the burdens of their heart. What do I have to offer them? Who am I that I should be speaking into their lives? I've got nothing to offer. All I can do is point them to Christ."

All You Can Do Is Point to Christ

I stopped praying at that point and, though my eyes were brimming with tears and I remained hunched in a posture of prayer, I actually started laughing—not foolishly or disrespectfully. It was just like God allowed me to pray the precise words that my own heart needed. The ridiculousness of what I had just spoken was powerful. I said the words again, quieter, savouring their beauty. "I've got nothing to offer. All I can do is point them to Christ."

Since when is that nothing? Since when is being able to encourage a brother or sister in Christ through reminding them of the finished work on the cross something so small that I would begin with the words, "All I can do . . ."

Looking to Christ Is Everything

Looking to Christ and remembering who we are in Him is everything! Keeping our eyes fixed on the Author of our faith through the sorrows of life is what the apostle Paul reminds us to do again and again. Every single one of us is equipped to encourage one another in the same way. Feeling weak and inadequate is part of being a finite human. But if we belong to Christ, then each one of us has been equipped to encourage.

Of course, there are certain situations where, because of the seriousness or complexity of the issue, a trained counsellor or mental health professional should be advised. Along with this, it is true that some individuals have been given a unique gift of wisdom and encouragement. But, we should want to grow in all these areas of life and ministry. Once these qualifications and distinctions have been noted, you simply can't escape the overwhelming emphasis of Scripture: every Christian is both called and equipped to encourage one another (1 Thess. 5:11, Heb. 3:13).

Christ Is Our Qualification

It's not about age or gender or education or title. It's about being a Christian. If the Spirit of Christ is at work in us, then we've been given what we need to speak words of hope. We may not be as holy, mature, wise, or studied in God's Word as we trust we'll one day become, but when we have Christ and can point others to Him, we've got enough.

It's wonderfully freeing to remember that what enables me to speak into someone's life is not that I'm a pastor's wife or that I'm good enough, wise enough, or holy enough, but instead that Christ was enough, and I belong to Him. This is the beauty of the gospel, powerfully demonstrated through our weakness and Christ's strength. I've got nothing to offer. All I can do is point them to Christ.

In this sense we're all identical, pastor's wife or not. We share the same Spirit, and we share the same mandate: to encourage one another. And you know, friends, maybe it's actually in this place of weakness where God will use us most:

  • That place where we realize we've got nothing to give but what we've been given;
  • That place where we feel our weakness but see His strength;
  • That place where any grace others see is but a mirrored reflection of the Grace Giver Himself.

Because when we're in that place, we stop relying on our strength and rely on Christ, instead. What do the people in our church need most? They need to be reminded to look to Jesus.

How can you point someone to Him today?

Did you discover God’s Truth today?

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About the Author

Elisha Galotti

Elisha Galotti

Elisha lives in Toronto, Canada, a city she loves and longs to see won for Christ. Her husband, Justin, shares her heart for their city and is thankful that God brought him to be the pastor of West Toronto Baptist Church. Though Elisha spends most of her time mothering her three wonderful and funny little ones, she is a lover of the arts and teaches ballet part-time. 

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