Does God Have Marriage or Singleness for Me?

Months ago, I had lunch with an incredibly wise couple. Between mouthfuls of pizza, I peppered them with questions about how to love people better, about whether it’s harmful to distinguish between everyday life and “ministry,” and about spiritual gifts. I also asked them how I could know if God had marriage or singleness for me.

Have you ever found yourself wrestling with this question?

At times, it just seems like it would be a very important thing to know. For example, I’ve been house-hunting for the past couple of months. If I knew I would be single for the rest of my life, I would have taken advantage of the government’s first-time home buyer tax credit, and bought a house. But, in the end, I decided to rent a house in order to be a bit less tied-down.

Anyway, back to our lunch conversation . . . I asked my friends, “How can I know if God has marriage or singleness for me?” 

Their answer surprised me. They told me that I was asking the wrong question, and that it would provide the wrong answer. Rather than speculating about my future, they told me to just assume that God will give me the best wherever I am.

So, these days I’m not asking that question anymore. Instead, I’m taking comfort in Truths like this one from Psalm 139:16-18: 

Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there were none of them. How precious to me are your thoughts, O God! How vast is the sum of them! If I would count them, they are more than the sand" (emphasis added).

I’m curious . . . do you agree or disagree that I was asking the wrong question? And do you believe that God will give you and me what’s best for us? Why or why not?

Did you discover God’s Truth today?

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About the Author

Paula Marsteller

Paula Marsteller

Paula has served with Revive Our Hearts for thirteen years. She is the author of Confessions of a Boy-Crazy Girl: On Her Journey from Neediness to Freedom. There's nothing she loves to share more than the gospel-centered truths that have so transformed her own life: what it means on a daily basis to be "dead to sin, alive to God, and in Christ Jesus." Paula, Trevor, and their son, Iren, make their home in New York.

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