Revive Our Hearts Podcast

Dannah Gresh: As a teenager, Sarah Mae mustered the courage to confront her mother.

Sarah Mae: I just said something along the lines of, “Mom, when you drink, you become really, really mean, and it really hurts me!” And she sort of just rolled her eyes and kind of laughed at me and said something along the lines of, “So what?!” 

“Like, what do you mean, ‘So what?!’ I think you’re an alcoholic!’” 

And she just laughed! It was like, “I know. Who cares? So what?”

Dannah: This is Revive Our Hearts with Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth, author of Choosing Forgiveness, for July 23, 2020. I’m Dannah Gresh.

Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth: If you grew up in a family where someone(s) close to you were involved in substance abuse and addiction, you understand the emotions, the frustrations, the manipulation, the bondage, and the dysfunction and pain that can be a part of that world.

Today on Revive Our Hearts, we’re going to hear the story of a woman who had that kind of upbringing, which then impacted her life as a young adult. In fact, some of what Sarah describes is pretty graphic and probably not best for young hearts to be exposed to. 

If you have some little ones nearby, you might want to get them busy elsewhere. And remember, you can always listen to the podcast later at ReviveOurHearts.com. As painful as Sarah’s story was, it is not a story without hope! Because as we’re reminded over and over again in Scripture: we have a redeeming God who is making all things new! Nothing is too difficult for Him! 

The typical cultural narrative is that someone raised in an alcoholic home is more or less doomed to repeat that same cycle, but as you’re about to hear, Jesus is bigger than cultural norms. Dannah, you sat down with Sarah Mae some months ago. I’m going to turn it over to you to help walk us through her story.

Dannah: Thanks, Nancy. I just love what God has done in Sarah’s life . . . and what He did in her mom’s life! I’m really excited to have Revive Our Hearts share this story. 

Sarah Mae is a wife, a mom, an author, and a broadcaster. But let’s start at the very beginning . . . [Julie Andrews singing] “Let’s start at the very beginning . . .” from Sound of Music’s “Doe a Deer.” 

Sarah: When I was little, the relationship with my mom was wonderful. My parents divorced before I was a year old, and then my dad actually got custody of me. So I was with him and would only see my mom in the summers. But those summers were my favorite! 

I always said when I was growing up that I wanted to be just like my mom or Madonna. (laughter)

“High ideals” when I was growing up! You know, I didn’t know any different; I didn’t know the Lord. I was a product of the eighties. And so, I thought my mom was seriously the absolute coolest mom ever! She was amazing!

We were so close. I always felt like she would talk to me about anything and everything. I mean, I thought she was just the best.

Dannah: Sarah discovered her mother’s journal after her death, and while young Sarah adored her mom, entries from that time period indicate things were less than idyllic, at least from the perspective of Sarah’s mom.

Journal Entry: November 8, 1986: I will list the reasons I tend to overlook my pain and anxiety . . .

Sarah: And she just writes this list of all of her hurts. There are like thirty things on this list. The top three: “the loss of Sarah, the lack of contact day-to-day with Sarah, a mother’s pain of conceiving a child and living without her.” It’s just so intense!

Dannah: So your mom was missing you.

Sarah: Yes. And it’s interesting, I have letters and cards from her from when I wasn’t living with her, when I was a little girl of how much she misses me and how much she loves me and can’t wait to see me. They’re so sweet and dear. I loved being with her.

That all changed when I decided I wanted to live with her. When I was fourteen I told my dad that I felt like a girl should be with her mother. And even though I loved my dad so much, I really wanted to live with my mom.

Dannah: At fourteen years old you show up.

Sarah: A little, teeny-tiny town in Georgia on the border of Alabama . . .

Dannah: . . . to live with your mom, and you just think, “This is going to be fantastic!”

Sarah: Yes. We pull up. My mom’s, like, twenty-year-old boyfriend comes out to greet us. He’s so nice, and my sister is there, and she has a dog.

Dannah: Your mom has a twenty-year-old boyfriend?

Sarah: Yes, she’s forty; he was living with her.

Dannah: I’m just checking . . . because I’m thinking, you’re fourteen. She has a twenty-year-old boyfriend; she’s forty.

Sarah: This is a little bit of a maybe weird situation, but I didn’t know that.

Dannah: This was your “normal.”

Sarah: This was my normal, so moving in at first was just incredible! I could do what I wanted. This sounds really funny, but I could take showers (in my house at home, my stepmom wouldn’t let me take showers. I could only take baths. We had some really weird dynamics at my house).

So I just really had this freedom. I could have my room how I wanted. It just felt like a letdown—like just freedom. I loved it so much, and I could just talk to my mom about anything. We would watch TV together; I’d hang out with her. It just felt free.

Dannah: And in many ways it was free, right? She wasn’t putting restraints on you the same way that your father and your stepmother were. What kid at the age of fourteen doesn’t want that, right? We want the freedom; we don’t want any of the responsibility; we want all the freedom. So that seemed good. When did you kind of realize it wasn’t as good as you thought?

Sarah: I would say pretty quickly, maybe after a few weeks. I think I just started to notice, one, that my mom drank all the time.

Dannah: We’re not talking about coffee, iced tea. 

Sarah: Right. We’re talking about vodka, whiskey, that kind of thing, more than just beer.

Dannah: Heavy stuff.

Sarah: I didn’t really have an understanding of alcoholism or what that was, so I didn’t really think too much about it. It was just sort of an observation. But what I began to observe and experience was that, when she would drink, she would act very cruel.

My mom became extremely verbally abusive to me. I wouldn’t have had those words until later, of course.

Dannah: What kinds of things would she say?

Sarah: It would just be things like I would come in from school one day and I would smile and she’d tell me, “You’re so ugly in those braces!” Or if I said, “Mom, that hurts my feelings,” she would laugh at me.

The biggest thing (and I only learned the term for it this year) was “gaslighting.” That’s where people convince you that you’re the one that’s crazy. So you don’t know what is up and what is down. So my mom had this brilliant way of manipulating me, where she would say really awful things to me, just be really mean to me. 

And then when I would finally get upset about it, she would be like, “What’s wrong with you?” Like, “Why are you acting like this!?” 

I was like, “Well, because you did this. . .”

She’d be like, “Oh, you’re just overreacting,” or “You’re being sensitive!”

And then you’re like, “Am I? Am I just being sensitive?” You have zero confidence in your own thoughts or your emotions or your ability to process what’s happening, and so you just are very confused. I was very, very confused.

Dannah: When your mom wasn’t drunk, was she different?

Sarah: Well, I never saw her when she wasn’t, it was all like one big . . . it was just who she was. After living there for a couple of years, I couldn’t tell you if this was who my mom was, or if this was her drinking, or if somehow there had become some overlap and this is just the way it was.

This was not like how it was when I would visit her in the summers. Because I was only there two months, maybe I didn’t see it or perhaps it had gotten worse. I don’t know. But I just know that it was a situation where a teenager should have somebody nurturing them, looking over them, giving them rules, and there was just a lot of neglect.

You don’t realize how much that affects you until things happen.

Dannah: It catches up, right? I’ve read some really interesting research on abuse vs. neglect. Abuse is actually easier to heal from, because there’s something in us even as children that when something’s really, really wrong, when we are verbally abused, or when we’re hit, or when we’re sexually abused, we know that shouldn’t have happened.

But when it’s this subtle slow drip of neglect and of not-parenting, we don’t know that it’s not okay. We don’t know that this “normal” is not healthy.

Sarah: Right!

Dannah: So then it’s really hard for us to even see that it was hurtful, to know that we need to address it. 

Sarah: Yes, that’s exactly right! When you’re a teenager, the stuff might bother you, like her calling me or sometimes there was physical stuff.

Dannah: Like what kind of physical stuff?

Sarah: It wasn’t often, but I can remember one time we were throwing chicken nuggets at each other. I don’t know what we were fighting about, and she came at me. And she was a larger, strong woman. I remember falling on the floor and her hitting me on the head because maybe I was holding on to her shirt or something. So sometimes it would get physical.

Dannah: Sarah, can you even imagine doing that with one of your daughters?

Sarah: No, I can’t, and I still tend to brush it off a little bit, I think.

Dannah: Yes, that’s why I’m asking, because even describing it, you’re like, “Yeah, this happened.”

Sarah: I think there’s still a bit of dissonance there for me, if I’m honest. But there were sometimes . . .

Dannah: Did you see any kind of violence or verbal abuse between your mom and her boyfriend?

Sarah: Oh, they fought all the time! I think I would have said my mom was passionate, but now I would just say, “Oh, she had some emotional issues.” She was married five times, and with one of her husbands, I remember her throwing chicken at him. 

Dannah: And you thought that “just happened.”

Sarah: Yes. I kind of thought it was funny, but at the same time it would kind of tense my stomach up. It was a mixture of, “Uh, this is kind of funny that she threw chicken,” and “Oh, this is awkward and terrible and awful!”

My sister ran out of the car once (she’s younger than me), and my mom was like, “Go get her back! Punch her, punch her!” And all of my anger as a teenager toward my little sister (because she would steal my clothes) came out. I thought, “Now I’m justified to hurt my sister!” But then there was part of me that was like, “But I don’t want to do it!”

My mom was like, “Do it!” So I remember hitting my sister, punching her twice in the head. She was probably like ten. And then I would feel so sick over it! For years even when I got older, I would cry over this event. My sister and I have talked about it, and I have asked forgiveness. I don’t even think she remembers it.

But it’s so imprinted on me, like how gross it was that I was being told to do this, but then there’s that part of my heart that wanted to do it. You can just see that this was the life. 

The final straw for me was, after feeling neglected, after my mom being so mean to me and not caring . . . I just felt completely unseen and unloved.

I thought, I know what’s going to make this all better. I’m going to confront her. I’m going to tell her she has a problem, and then she’s going to see. Then she’ll get help, and then things will be better.” So before I turned to anything else, I kind of thought this was going to work. “I’m going to fix this.”

I’d seen some talk show where somebody has an intervention on somebody who’s an alcoholic. Then everybody’s happy, and they all hug, and the person gets help, and then they’re on a talk show! So I get up the courage and I go out to see my mom on the porch where she’d always sit and smoke. And, basically, I confronted her.

I just said something along the lines of, “Mom, when you drink, you become really, really mean, and it really hurts me!” 

And she sort of just rolled her eyes and laughed at me and said something along the lines of, “So what?!” 

“Like, what do you mean, ‘So what?!’ I think you’re an alcoholic!” 

And she just laughed. It was like, “I know. Who cares? So what?”

And then I thought as a teen, I have to hurt her now back. What was something that would hurt a mother?” So I said, “I don’t even think I love you!” If my daughter said that to me, that would break my heart! And she just laughed!

I just remember that moment thinking, I don’t have a mom. I’m alone. I don’t know, it was just teenage-y hormones and sadness and all the things. It was then that I thought if I took a bath that night, I wonder if you can slit your wrists with a pink Daisy razor. You know, like, “I don’t know what I’m doing!”

I remember yelling out to my mom, “I’m going to kill myself!” And really, it’s not that I wanted to kill myself, it’s that I wanted her to give me the attention and run in and say, “No, don’t!” And she said, “Go ahead! I dare you!” And that was like the breaking point.

Dannah: Wow. You’re telling that to me pretty matter-of-factly, so I’m wondering how you felt when you heard her say those words.

Sarah: When she said them, I just sobbed! Two things happened simultaneously. One, I was just so confusingly heartbroken, but then the other thing that was happening at the same time—which I can’t explain; I don’t really have words for it—is that there was this fire that was in me that wouldn’t get out. 

I constantly felt like there was this rage burning inside of me that I didn’t know what to do with. It was just constantly there, mixed with such a guttural sadness. I don’t know what you call that. I don’t know what it is, but that’s how I felt.

Dannah: Maybe you call it “broken.”

Sarah: I felt very broken and very alone. 

Dannah: It seems to me that it’s fair to say—as an outsider, and you looking back now—that there was a lot of hurt and trauma brought on by your mom, by your family. Was there ever a time when you felt like you needed to take ownership for how you interacted with them? Or did you feel guilt or shame? Or were you just mad at everybody?

Sarah: That’s a good question. I think I didn’t have a lot of feelings about anything, and here’s why that is. Going back to the gaslighting thing and being manipulated. You learn not to trust your own emotions and your own thoughts. So what you do instead is, you almost become like a blank screen, and you don’t feel or think. You just sort of “are.”

And that’s how I was with everybody. I wouldn’t say a “robot,” because I wasn’t that bad. But I definitely pushed any possible emotion away or any thoughts of any of it. I would say there was anger and sadness underneath, but it was so far back. I had learned to cope by not feeling anything; that I didn’t feel those things. I didn’t really feel much. 

Dannah: You were numb. God made us to feel things. He made us to feel hurt, depressed, angry, sad. Even those things we think are negative emotions, He’s created, because they’re kind of like the skin of our soul. They tell us that we’re not safe.

Sarah: Yes.

Dannah: Like when we touch something that’s hot, it’s not safe for us. Our skin tells us, “No! Don’t touch this.” I think when emotions become really toxic and there’s not the support we need to deal with them, a lot of times our emotional system just shuts down. And that’s what happened to you.

Sarah: Absolutely, completely. If I did have a strong emotion about something, it would be so wildly out of control that I didn’t even know what to do with it! So it would go between nothing and then if a boyfriend hurt me, like being out of control with feelings that I didn’t even know what to do with! So it was a very weird pendulum shift for me.

Dannah: Sarah’s life was a life where selfishness ruled and God was absent, so it’s not surprising that she quickly looked for a sense of belonging in her relationship with a boyfriend. She said he was . . .

Sarah: A kid from school. And I say “kid,” because we were just kids. We were fourteen and his mom was on crack. He didn’t have a dad; they had no money. I remember him wearing my sneakers to school. We just connected on this level of, “We don’t have anybody else but each other.” 

It wasn’t like, “Oh, I’m in love with this guy; he’s my boyfriend!” It was like, “He’s my boyfriend because we’re each other’s only thing.” 

Dannah: There was little supervision from her mother and only vague instruction from her father. 

Sarah: My dad was a really good man. I loved him very much, but he didn’t know how to have these conversations. And so he was like, “Have good morals,” but I didn’t know what that meant.

Dannah: So here you have a boyfriend . . .

Sarah: I have a boyfriend, we’re fourteen, we start having sex. I think that’s normal, like that’s what you’re supposed to do. At sixteen I was watching cartoons before school, eating my cereal, and all of a sudden I threw up, and I was like, “Whoa! What is wrong with me?” I was really sick, and so I had the thought of, “What if I’m pregnant?”

I had never even considered that. I mean, that wasn’t even in my mind that that would happen. So we get this pregnancy test and we go sit in a church parking lot, just because there happened to be a church up the street from my house. I just remember when the test turned and said I was pregnant, just throwing it out the window, shaking.

He ran out and got the test and wanted to keep it. There was no thought of anything but having this baby. I just thought, This is life now. I’m going to have to marry this guy. We’re going to get a trailer, have a family, this is what it is.

Dannah: Her assumptions were soon challenged by extended family members. 

Sarah: So I told my dad, and he was really kind. Then I told my grandmother, and she said she’d have it “taken care of.” 

And I told her, “Well, I’m going to have this baby,” and she hung up the phone on me.

Dannah: That kind of shunning and passive punishment would prove to be powerful to the young and naive Sarah.

Sarah: I don’t think I even knew what abortion was, to be quite honest. I didn’t know anything! I just was really ignorant of a lot of things.

Dannah: You were very young. I have a picture of you (you posted it on your Instagram account recently). Little braces . . . You were pregnant in that picture. You look like a little girl.

Sarah: I know, when I see myself, it makes me so sad, because she is just so alone! So alone . . . that’s the number one feeling I think I had through a lot of those years. So alone.

Dannah: So how did your mom respond to you when she found out that you were pregnant?

Sarah: The best way to say it is that she didn’t. I told her, and I just remember her face being completely blank, like she didn’t even know what to do. Then she just checked out of the entire situation. I don’t even think we talked about it; she just completely checked out.

I know now that the reason she checked out was because she’d had two abortions, and she never healed from or processed those. My mom had a tendency to revert to a little girl when she was scared, and so in this situation, it was as though she became a little girl and just had absolutely no idea how to handle it, so she just didn’t.

Dannah: Several in Sarah’s extended family applied pressure for her to have an abortion; they did it by witholding affection and even touch. It was insensitive at best, if not downright manipulative. Then another grandmother pulled Sarah aside to try to convince her to end the life of the baby. 

While abortion itself is cruel and violent, the grandmother’s manner toward Sarah was sweet and tender.

Sarah: When my grandmother came and put her arms around me and showed me affection and love, I was like, “Okay, I’m done. I’ll do what everybody wants.” Like, “I’m so sick of being the outcast. I want to be back in the fold!” The night before I went in for the abortion, I just cried and held my stomach and asked the baby to forgive me. I knew that it was a baby.

Dannah: She was unconscious for the procedure itself. 

Sarah: When I woke up, I went into the kitchen and my grandmother had breakfast for me, and she served it to me with a smile. We never talked about it again, ever. It was never brought up, ever.

Dannah: Not processing the experience formed a callous on Sarah’s heart.

Sarah: When you can’t talk about something and you have to almost pretend it didn’t exist, you have to push it so far away that eventually you sort of become detached from it, and it’s almost as though it didn’t happen. You know it did, but you’ve never thought about it, talked about it, processed it, anything. You’re just so detached. 

Dannah: Sarah, when does your story start to become hopeful?

Sarah: Well, what’s so amazing about my story that I just love so much is that even through these different dark periods in my life, I look back and I see God there. I see Him just sitting with me in the pit, like just sitting with me in the dark. Almost like, “I am here when you’re ready.” I feel like He was wooing me. 

I need to give a couple of examples so that you know what I mean. When I was around nine years old and living with my dad, my sister was kidnapped by her dad . . . and there’s a whole situation around that.

Dannah: This story gets more and more complicated.

Sarah: Yes, it is complicated, that’s why the book is called The Complicated Heart. There are layers, and there are reasons for all of that. But anyway, she was taken by her dad on a visitation. My mom had dropped her off for visitation, and he just didn’t come back.

When I found this out, I prayed every night to a God I did not know that we would find her. About six months to a year later, my mom did find my sister in another state, and they were able to get her back. That was something that cemented in me that there was a God. So whatever that was happening in my heart, I knew there was a God. 

I didn’t know Jesus. I didn’t know anything, but I knew He heard me. Several years later when I was fourteen, I moved in with my mom. An uncle visited, and he gave me this Christian cassette tape by Clay Cross.

My uncle said something to me like, “Hey, maybe you’ll like this music.” I never knew there was such a thing as Christian music. I probably just thought, “Maybe it’s a tape of something cool.”

So I’m listening to this music, and I’m hearing this man sing about this Jesus. I don’t understand any of it, but I’m bawling my eyes out, praying that God will give me whatever it is this man is talking about. “I want it!” 

Song: “And when I fall, let me fall into the arms of Jesus . . .” 

Sarah: So that was another way that I felt like God was sitting with me, like He was there letting me know in these little ways. Then, that same uncle took us to a church.

People opened the doors, and they’re smiling and clapping and singing! I’m like, “What is this? I’ve never seen this before in my life! Why are people singing and clapping and looking so happy in church? This is weird!”

I just remember this thought coming to my fourteen- or fifteen-year-old brain. There was no context for it, and it was, “The Spirit is here.” I just remember the pastor speaking, and I could understand him. It was another wooing moment for me of, “There’s a place for you, and there’s more than you think there is.” Like, “God is more than what you’ve known Him to be or seen Him to be. There’s more.” 

So all of these little things. It wasn’t like I became a Christian, but it was like God was wooing me on this journey, and I kept seeing Him in places.

My first experience with Scripture was this same uncle giving this book called Armed and Dangerous. It was like you looked up a topic and then there were Scriptures on it. I would just sit and read it for hours! I’m like, “Oh, this is really good! This is good wisdom!” I didn’t know it was the Word of God.

So fast-forward, and in high school I end up—after three years—moving back with my dad. I can’t take it anymore with my mom and I’m like, “I’m out of here!” The boyfriend cheated on me, so it was a great out. I’m like, “I can leave, go back to Pennsylvania.”

I thought, I’m going to start fresh. Nobody knows anything about me. I can be normal, like nobody’s going to know any of my history or any of my weird dysfunctional stuff. I’m in eleventh grade, and the thing that everybody does on Wednesday nights is, they go to Young Life, because that’s how you get out of your house.

So I start going to Young Life, and it’s there that I first start hearing the gospel and I first start hearing about this Man, Jesus. I begin to actually have questions, and now I’m really thinking about it. Again, the gospel isn’t presented in one form to me; I’m like piecing things together. 

But I remember thinking, I’m going to be a serious Christian! I’m going to read my Bible, and I’m going to follow God!—even though I didn’t totally understand all of it. Anyway, my freshman year of college I got involved with a ministry called The Navigators, and we went on a retreat.

At the retreat, there was this man there. He said, “What would you do if Jesus walked in the room right now?” 

I remember thinking, Well, I would hide! He would not want to see me. I would go and hide.

Then I think we got in small groups. I don’t know if the Lord impressed this on my heart or somebody said it to me, but it was this idea of, “Sarah, Jesus knows everything that you’ve ever done, everything you’re doing, and everything you’re going to do, and He loves you.” I already knew I was a sinner. Nobody had to tell me that. I knew I was bad.

Dannah: That was the tape that played over and over in your mind.

Sarah: That was the tape that played over, but to know that I could be loved anyway . . . that was the game changer for me! I became a Jesus girl, and couldn’t get enough of my Bible. That was it; I was done; I was sold!

Dannah: Would you say that’s the point when you really surrendered your life to Christ?

Sarah: Oh, absolutely! Yes!

Dannah: And you were surrounded by people who could help you understand that and disciple you?

Sarah: Oh, yes. That was the miracle of it. Because I don’t have a date that I became a Christian, again because I had to puzzle it together. But I would say that the biggest surrender came around then, and being a part of the Navs was the safest, most gracious place that I could have been at. 

They were so intensely, wonderfully, beautifully discipleship-oriented, that I wasn’t just lost at sea with this newfound information . . . not that I would have been, because I had God. But I had people surrounding me that were safe and healthy emotionally and spiritually, and could teach me.

Dannah: Yes.

Nancy: In 2 Corinthians 5:17, Paul says, “If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” And that is exactly what God did in Sarah Mae’s life. He made her a new creation. All the tangled wounds and sins and mess of her life, God began to heal and restore as Sarah Mae began to experience the amazing grace and forgiveness of God. 

As you’ve been listening to Sarah’s story, maybe you can relate to some of the pain, the hurt, the mess that she experienced.

I want to encourage you that the same God who has rescued and redeemed Sarah’s life from destruction is also available today to redeem your life from whatever the mess may be of your past. 

Just cry out to Him and say, “Lord, I need You! I need Your grace! I can’t undo the stuff of the past, but I know that You can give me a fresh start, and You can make me a new creation through the grace of Jesus Christ!”

Dannah will be back with Sarah in just a moment to finish up our program, but first I want to just mention that this conversation is part of our series here in the month of July on practical topics for wise living, dealing with the ins and outs of our past, our pain, our sinful failures. All of this definitely falls in that category.

And if you’re looking for more wisdom for whatever your past or your present may look like, I want to tell you about The Little Red Book of Wisdom. It’s a little book by my little brother, Mark DeMoss, who’s actually a really wise man! This book is full of wise advice, including how to get to the end of your life without regrets.

This month we’ll be glad to send you a copy of Mark’s book as our way of saying “thank you” for your donation of any amount to support Revive Our Hearts. Giving to the ministry has been down a bitthus far this month, and we’d be so grateful for your gift to help us meet our budget in July. 

To make a gift, contact us at ReviveOurHearts.com or call us at 1-800-569-5959. And be sure to ask for your copy of The Little Red Book of Wisdom when you make your donation. Well, Dannah, there’s a lot more to the story of Sarah Mae and her mom.

Dannah: There sure is, Nancy. And you know, about the same time God was having an encounter with Sarah, He was at work in the life of her mom, too. While Sarah was in college, her relationship with her mom was really a constant struggle, but reading her mother’s journal later, Sarah sees that her mom was grieving some losses and the effects of her heavy abuse of alcohol.

Journal Entry: What’s going on with me and my girls? I wish I could take back the many times I put my selfish ways ahead of my children when they were growing up! I wish I now had wonderful memories to recollect with them, special ones. I wish I’d been more of a mother and less out of control, less needy. I bet my kids would look up to me if I were a better mother.

Sarah: What’s so interesting about that is that she never expressed those things to me or my sister. So she had these private thoughts that, if you read this, you’re like, “Wow! She really did care!” But we would have never known that. I didn’t discover these until after she died. She never expressed any of this during that time.

All we saw while she was . . . This is why it’s so complicated. All this is the stuff she’s thinking and writing, but to us she’s still mean and abusive and unedited. She says she loves Jesus, but doesn’t act like it at all! So it’s just a complete disconnect!

Dannah: So I guess, then, the question that we want to try to answer tomorrow is, “How do you forgive?” Just because you found Jesus, you still had some healing to unravel in your life. Part of that involved forgiving the mother who wounded you and contributed to so much of these decisions you made as a high school student.

How do you forgive someone who has hurt you, and the wound is still there? They could still continue to hurt you, they are still continuing to hurt you? How do you heal when your circumstances don’t change? That’s what we want to talk about tomorrow, Sarah. Will you come back?

Sarah: Yes!

Dannah: Great! We’ll talk about that tomorrow on Revive Our Hearts. 

Revive Our Hearts with Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth loves bringing stories of transformation. Our program is an outreach of Life Action Ministries.









 

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