The Role a Wife Plays in Father’s Day

Happy Father’s Day, Mom!

This month, celebrate the significant role that you play in your child’s relationship with Dad.

A man’s ability to be a great dad is highly connected to the way his wife promotes, helps, and sets him up for success. Of course, every man is responsible before God to love, protect, and provide for his child, but a thoughtful, intentional wife can help him to succeed.

This Father’s Day, consider how important you are in fostering a meaningful relationship between your child and Dad.

As part of the celebration, consider these five gifts that you can give your husband on Father’s Day (and every day) that will help him to succeed in his calling.

1. Prayer

Did you know that your prayers for your husband can change his life? History will be different because you prayed for your husband to be a great dad.

My cousin taught me that we can pray for our husbands from head to toes. Pray that his eyes would only see things that are godly and that his mind would be sharp and clear, thinking on God’s Word. Pray that his mouth would only speak words that are kind and helpful and that his hands would do the work of the Lord. Pray that his feet would hold him up and take him wherever he should go.

We can also pray specifically for our husband’s role as a father. Pray that he would emulate God the Father in love and faithfulness. Ask God to help your husband talk to your child about God and His Word. Pray that he would walk in integrity and provide for his family. Pray that he would lead your family righteously, train your children in the Lord, and have the joy of seeing his children walk in the truth.

The righteous who walks in his integrity— blessed are his children after him! (Prov. 20:7).

2. Communication

Mothers often know much more about their children than fathers do. We usually maintain the family calendar, manage homework, interact with teachers, interact with our child’s friends, and hear the highs and lows of our child’s day. This is a privilege and a responsibility. It puts us in the role of ambassador between our child and our husband. We represent one to the other, share information about one to the other, and encourage their relationship.

When we keep our husbands up-to-date about our child’s activities and personal life, we are setting them up for a closer relationship. Consider making time each day to talk to your husband about your son’s strengths and weaknesses. Tell him about your daughter’s friends. Let him know what your child is struggling with, what she is interested in, and what went on today. I’ve learned a few different strategies from watching my friends communicate with their husbands. My friend Christine texts her husband little updates throughout the day. Lois keeps notes about the day on an index card in her back pocket. At the dinner table, she uses it as a cheat sheet as she tells her husband about the day. Trish and her husband sit down on the couch at the end of the day while the kids play nearby. They talk about the day, and Trish updates him about each child.

How will you update your husband about your child? This will open the door of communication so that your husband can offer insight, encouragement, and prayer for your child.

While you’re at it, consider updating your child about your husband, too. Let her know about your husband’s recent success at work. Tell your son about something kind your husband said to you yesterday. Talk about Daddy’s plans for the upcoming week so that your children have the opportunity to pray for him and engage in his life.

Your thoughtfulness and generosity will pay off in a strong and caring relationship between your husband and your child.

3. Support

When your husband expresses an idea about your child, support him. Make room for Dad’s preferences, hobbies, and plans. Get behind him, and help his plans to succeed. Your child is watching you for cues about how to respond to Dad.

Speak highly of your husband’s gifts, work, strengths, and role in your family. Take his picture when he is spending time with your child. Encourage the whole family to greet him heartily when he wakes up in the morning, comes home from work, or picks a child up from after-school activities.

Every time you rally behind Dad, you are affirming his God-given role in your family and demonstrating love to your children.

An excellent wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels. The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain. She does him good, and not harm, all the days of her life (Prov. 31:10–12).

4. Encouragement

Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear (Eph. 4:29).

How is your husband trying to be a great dad? I bet he’d love to hear that you notice. Tell him that you notice his efforts. Tell him to keep pressing on. Tell him that his efforts will significantly impact your child.

Instead of focusing on things that you wish he would do differently, invest your words in encouraging and thanking him for the things he is doing right.

Cheer on the man who is making an effort toward godly fatherhood. Ask him how you can help him. Too often we complain about our husband’s leadership instead of looking for ways that we can get behind them, follow them, strengthen them, help them, and give them courage to keep on.

How can we verbally affirm and encourage our husbands as fathers?

(Can’t find anything to encourage? Ask God to help you see the best things your husband is doing as a dad. You may be surprised by what you notice!)

5. Trust

Your trust in your husband’s ability to be a great father—and his ability to learn as he goes—will be such a blessing to him!

Ideally, we’d demonstrate trust from the beginning. It is so beneficial for a new mom to trust her husband with their newborn baby. Though we may have maternal instinct and more experience with babies, if we graciously allow our husbands to comfort, soothe, and care for our children, we’ll boost their confidence and build a very important relationship between our children and their fathers.

Maybe the newborn years are long past, but it’s never too late to begin trusting our husbands with our children. Even if he doesn’t think like you do or make similar decisions, you can demonstrate that you trust him to love your child, learn from mistakes, and grow stronger every day.

Trust him to be—or become—an equally contributing member of your parenting team. Your trust will go a long way in overcoming your husband’s insecurity, fear of failure, and temptation toward complacency.

Every mother has a big part to play in helping her child’s father succeed. Mothers have the profound opportunity to serve the Lord Jesus as He turns the hearts of fathers toward their children and the hearts of children toward their fathers (Mal. 4:6). Your prayers, communication, encouragement, support, and trust will eternally impact your children and the man they call “Dad.”

Which gifts will you give your husband today?

Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: “Many women have done excellently, but you surpass them all.” Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised. Give her of the fruit of her hands, and let her works praise her in the gates (Prov. 31:28–31).


About the Author

Laura Booz

Laura Booz

Laura Booz is the author of Expect Something Beautiful: Finding God's Good Gifts in Motherhood and the host of the Expect Something Beautiful podcast with Revive Our Hearts. She'll cheer you on, share practical ideas, and point out the … read more …

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