Daily Program

A Foolish Woman's Words

Series: Becoming a Woman of Discretion

Leslie Basham: You've probably seen news reports showing a building being imploded. The tearing down of a building can draw huge crowds, as engineers demonstrate their power to reduce a large stable structure to a pile of rubble. Did you know that our words can have a similar power?

It is Tuesday, February 10th. Welcome to Revive Our Hearts with Nancy Leigh DeMoss.

Most of us will never demolish a literal building. But we can tear down our families and those around us through our words and actions. Let's join Nancy as she continues in a series called, "Becoming a Woman of Discretion." 

Nancy Leigh DeMoss: We're talking during these days are about two different kinds of women: wise women and foolish women. And we've seen that the wise woman, according to Proverbs, chapter 14, verse 1, the wise woman, the woman with a wise heart is a builder. Her life is constructive. Her influence on others encourages them and builds them up. She builds her house, not just her literal family, though that is certainly the most important family, but also others around her sphere of influence.

We've seen that the woman with the foolish heart tears down her house. She's destructive. With her hands and her life, she pulls down those around her.

We also said that there's not really a middle ground here. We are either wise women or we are foolish women. We are either building up or tearing down the lives around us.

Now, over these next several sessions, we want to focus on this matter of a foolish woman. What does a foolish woman look like? What does she act like? What are her characteristics?

Proverbs chapter 7 provides for us, I think, one of the most vivid, thorough descriptions of a foolish woman that you will find anywhere in God's Word. So let me encourage you, if you have your Bible, to open to that passage, Proverbs chapter 7.

I want to begin reading just the first five verses of this chapter and, then, in the days ahead, we'll go verse by verse through this entire description of a foolish woman and see if there is anything in this passage that God's exposes to be a need in our own lives.

Now actually, the context of this passage is that a father is teaching his son. He is going to warn his son about foolish women. So we, as women, need to look at this description and see the kind of woman this man was warning his son about.

So, beginning in verse 1, the father says, "My son, keep my words, and lay up my commandments with thee. (v.2) Keep my commandments, and live [KJV].

Now, make note of that word "live" because when we come down the road to the end of this chapter, we're going to see that the foolish woman leads a man to death. The end of her pathway is the way of death. And in the last verse, verse 27 of this chapter, you'll see that the conclusion of a foolish woman is death.

But this father is saying to his son, "If you'll listen to my words, heed my commandments, look for wise women and avoid foolish women, the result will be life."

So that says that, we, as women can be life-givers. If we are wise, we can give life to the men around us. And we'll see, to the contrary, if we are foolish women, we will produce death in others.

So, this father says in verse 2, "Keep my commandments, and live; and my law as the apple of thine eye. (v.3) Bind them upon thy fingers, Write them upon the table of thine heart" [KJV].

"Don't forget these things," he's saying. These are so important. Put reminders everywhere around you so that you can be warned against this foolish kind of woman.

"Say unto wisdom, Thou are my sister; and call understanding thy kinswoman" [Prov.7:4, KJV].

"Look for wisdom; look for understanding," he's saying. Get close to them; get closely related to them and what will happen?

He says to his son, "If you get close to wisdom, if you walk with people who are wise, and if you stay close to wise people, what will happen? Verse 5 "they may keep thee from the strange woman, from the stranger which flattereth with her words [KJV].

The "strange" woman. Now, perhaps your translation says the word, "adulteress." Another translation takes that phrase and says, "the loose woman." The word, "strange," really means literally, "to turn aside." It's a woman who is wayward. She has turned aside and is the epitome of a foolish woman.

In the Song of Solomon, chapter 8, verse 9, there's a verse that references two different kinds of women. And there's a word picture given. It says that some women are like a wall and some woman are like a door.

Now, as you think about the women you know, and by the way, this is an important thing to notice even in your young daughters because women have natural bents, one direction or the other, to be more of a wall or more of a door. And when you think of a wall, you think of something that is firm and unyielding. I can walk up to that wall; I can push against it, but the wall isn't going anywhere. It's not going to move. It settled; it's established.

In the Song of Solomon, we're seeing that some women are like a wall. When foolish, simple, unwise or ungodly men come against them, those women have lives that are built upon convictions; and they're not going anywhere. They're not going to be moved by ungodly advances or by inappropriate behavior on the part of men. They're firm; they're unyielding in their convictions because they have rooted their lives in the ways of God.

Now, when you think of a door, as we have some doors in this room, I can walk up to a door and open it. I can push against it. I can move it back and forth. It's not going to stay in just one position. And that's a picture of a woman who yields easily to ungodly or inappropriate behavior on the part of man--she gives in.

Her life is not built on conviction. Do you see the difference between the wise woman, she's like a wall and the foolish woman, who is like a door. Watch for this in your daughters. Teach your sons to watch for it in other women; to find out, is this woman more like a wall or a door? The strange woman is the one who is like a door. She's a loose woman; she has turned aside; she doesn't stay in the straight and narrow holy path.

Now few, if any of us in this room, would consider ourselves to be immoral women. And as we're going to read through Proverbs chapter 7, over these next days, you'll see some pretty graphic descriptions.

And the natural response is "That woman isn't me. I don't act that way" and you may not in terms of outward behavior. But most of us as women today, and all of us in some way, have been influenced so subtly by the world and its way of thinking.

The ways of the world have infiltrated the lifestyles of those of us who are church women, who know the Lord, and know more about the ways of God. We've been more influenced than we realize, in most cases, by worldly and foolish ways of thinking.

Now, I'm not suggesting that all those women, all of us, who have been influenced in some way by the world's way of thinking are adulteresses or "harlots" is the word used later in this passage.

I'm not suggesting that every woman who has any of these characteristics is an immoral woman. But we do need to ask ourselves, as we get into this passage, if we have adopted any of the characteristics describing this woman.

It talks about her speech, her dress, her demeanor, her attitudes, her ways of thinking, her ways of relating to men, her values that are temporal versus eternal.

You may not be this immoral woman. This woman in this passage is a prostitute in a sense. She's acting like one. She is knowingly, willingly, intentionally ensnaring a young foolish man. And we'll see that as the passage unfolds in the days ahead.

You may never have had that kind of behavior. But, as I have gone through this passage, I thank the Lord for having, by His grace and mercy, protected me from those outward expressions of this immoral woman.

But I must tell you, I've been convicted over and over again in this passage that some of those traits have roots in my own heart, that some of those characteristics are ways that I have acted and responded toward men, not in outward visible ways but in matters of the heart.

And so, we have to ask, "Lord, show me if any of these characteristics that we're going to look at, characteristics of this strange woman, this loose woman, this turned aside woman; are any of these characteristics in me," characteristics that ultimately lead to the ruin and downfall of the men around us?

Do you know anyone of us as women and I'm speaking to women in this room who have a heart for the Lord; you love God; you want to be a godly woman, that's why you're here in this session.

But anyone of us, and I include myself, may unwittingly, unknowingly, unintentionally be causing the men around us to stumble.

I'm not just talking about out there in the world, I'm saying in our church relationships, in our Christian homes, in our Christian schools, in our work places. We may be causing the men around us to stumble in foolish ways and ultimately go in ways that lead to death and not even realize that that's what we have done.

So, we need to learn and recognize the traits, the characteristics of this foolish woman, this strange woman, this loose woman, and open up our hearts and say, "Lord, is that me? Have I, in ways I have not even realized, been a foolish woman tearing down the lives of men around me?"

Leslie Basham: That's Nancy Leigh DeMoss, challenging us to learn the differences between a wise woman, one that builds her house; and a foolish woman, one who tears down those around her.

We hope this broadcast served as part of that learning process. It's part of a series of messages called "Becoming a Woman of Discretion." We're making this series available on two cassettes for an $8 suggested donation and two CDs for $10.

You'll also want to get a copy of Nancy's free booklet, A Biblical Portrait of Womanhood. It will help you grow into the wise woman that we'll be hearing about this week.

To get your free booklet, visit ReviveOurHearts.com or call 1-800-569-5959.

If you find yourself constantly using words to tear down others, could we pray with you? We have a team here, that faithfully prays for our listeners. You can send your requests to ReviveOur Hearts.

We hope you can be back tomorrow when we explore how a foolish woman uses words to deceive others. Now let's join Nancy in prayer.

Nancy Leigh DeMoss: We're going to move on in this passage in the days ahead. But let's just take a moment now and pause; open our hearts to the Lord and you may just want to bow your head before the Lord and say, "Lord, show me any ways that I've been a foolish woman. Show me any ways that I've been a loose woman and they may be ways that I've never seen, I've been blind to, I haven't realized it; but I just want to be honest before you, and I want you to shine the light of your Word and truth into my heart and expose what I may never have seen.

And, Lord, where there are those ways in me, may I be quick to confess, to agree with You and repent. And would You make me into a wise woman. Would You make me into a woman who builds up the lives of men around me, that my life may be a godly influence.

Thank you, Lord, for your Word and Your ways that are given to protect us and given for our good and for the good of those around us. We pray that your Word would give insight and light into our lives, that You may be glorified through us as women. I pray in Jesus' name, Amen.

Leslie Basham:

Revive Our Hearts with Nancy Leigh DeMoss is a ministry partnership of Life Action Ministry.

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